A Twist
by Welcome2MyMind
Summary: AU. Takes place in the same time as movie. A 'what if' Ennis didn't work for Aguirre up on Brokeback the summer of '63. Would fate still bring Jack and Ennis together? Work in progress
1. Misery

Ennis Del Mar lay in bed, satisfied that he had the day off. On his usual days off, he ended up just going to the ranch to work, but today he was too exhausted. It hadn't been too long since he, Alma, and the girls had moved into town. Alma said it'd be better for the girls and Ennis just couldn't say no. She got moody when she didn't get what she wanted anyway. After only a few years of marriage, he had already learned to say what she wanted to hear instead of what he really thought.

And that was the fact that he wasn't happy. He had been feeling this way for a long time. Ever since Alma yanked him out of a job to get married sooner. He hadn't heard from Joe Aguirre to find out if he had been missed that summer or not. Apparently, he hadn't. If Ennis had shown up, he'd probably get fussed at and then fired anyway, so it really wasn't a big deal right?

Other than the fact that he felt as if he had gotten tricked into this marriage just because Alma wanted kids and a family. He had thought he loved her, which was why he had proposed to her, but marrying her had changed that.

He felt as if there was something missing.

"Ennis, you awake?" He could hear Alma's voice coming from the kitchen.

Ennis ran his fingers through his hair with a sigh, wondering if he could get away with sleeping a little later. But, that would just give her an excuse to fuss at him. At least he tried to keep this marriage thing going. She treated it as if she was just playing house as a little girl.

"Yeah," Ennis said as he sat up. He took a quick shower and dressed then walked out into the kitchen. The girls were sitting at the table eating. He kissed them on the head then sat down, not even bothering to greet Alma with a kiss.

Alma didn't even notice. She was completely oblivious to anything he felt. She was in her perfect little world, why would she want that ruined by asking how Ennis felt about all of this? She would only point out that he wasn't doing anything to stop it, so why should he even say anything?

There was hardly any communication in this marriage.

"Think you can pick a couple of things up at the store for me?" Alma asked, sitting down at the table once she placed Ennis' breakfast in front of him. "I'm takin' the girls in for a checkup."

"Sure," Ennis said with a nod of his head as he started eating. She listed off what she needed then just gave up telling him and wrote it all down then stuck it in his shirt pocket, giving him a peck on the cheek before she moved off to get the girls dressed and ready.

Ennis finished his breakfast in silence. He left the plate on the table and got up. He grabbed his jacket and put it on, along with his hat, before he stepped out of the house. The morning breeze blew in, making him feel better now that he was out of the house and away from a certain company. He headed down the stairs and walked over to his truck and headed for the store. 


	2. Fate

Ennis got what Alma had put on the list, thinking that maybe he should waste more time walking around just so he wouldn't have to go home. Of course, he'd probably go back home to an empty house since Alma was probably still at the doctor's office with the girls. But, what would he do alone? Decide to go off to work after all? Would it hurt to earn just a bit more money?

"Howdy, Ennis," Munroe said when Ennis placed his items down for checkout. "Things goin' good this morning?"

"Yeah," Ennis said with a nod, distracted as Munroe rung up everything. He glanced off to the side slightly as the door opened and a man walked in.

He was clearly not from around here as he looked around. Ennis looked away when he found himself studying the man too closely. He was around Ennis' age with dark hair and the bluest eyes Ennis had ever seen. He kept his attention down on his items as the man walked over.

"Hey, my truck broke down 'bout a mile back," the man said. Why the hell was his voice causing Ennis' stomach to flip flop? "I'm kinda in a hurry, so do you know anybody that could help? At a decent price?"

"Sure," Munroe replied. He gave the man directions then the normal asking price to get his truck fixed up. Ennis glanced out of the corner of his eye to see that the man wasn't pleased with that offer. Ennis couldn't blame him. He wouldn't pay that kind of money either.

Ennis gave a slight shake of his head then looked over at the guy. "I can take a look at it," he said, getting the man's attention. Fuck. That gaze was even more intense when it was right on you. "Don't gotta pay nothin'."

"Ennis is good with that sort of thing," Munroe chimed in. He rung up the rest of Ennis' items, placing them in bags. "He can have your truck up and runnin' in no time."

The man looked at Munroe then back at Ennis. "You sure?" he asked. "I'd be mighty grateful."

"Wouldn't want you spendin' more money than you need to," Ennis said, grabbing his bags. He was taken a bit by surprise when the man grabbed the rest of his bags, offering his help in return.

They headed out to the truck and placed the things in the back. "So, it's just a mile outta town?" Ennis asked, looking at the guy.

The man gestured in the general direction of where his truck was located. "Only thing on that damn road," he said, his arm slapping against his side as he lowered it. "You sure you don't mind doin' this?"

"Nope," Ennis said then climbed into the truck. The man got in the passenger's seat. Neither of them said anything as Ennis pulled out and headed down the road that led out of town. His gut told him that he was going to get fussed at when he got back home. Alma would be expecting him to be home when she got there. Helping this guy out, he wouldn't get home until later.

Ennis pulled the truck over and got out. He walked over to the man's truck with the guy-why hadn't he gotten his name?-then popped the hood.

"The truck's always givin' me problems," the man said. "Probably should've kicked the bucket years ago." He kicked the tire of the truck a bit annoyingly. He seemed really aggravated.

"I can get it to workin', but it'd take a lot of time," Ennis said without looking away from the truck's engine. "Probably be faster to take it to a professional."

"How long do ya think it'd take?"

Ennis shrugged. "I ain't a professional," he said, looking over at the guy. "How fast do ya need this done?"

"Within the next few days," the man replied. "I'd still be cuttin' it close by then, though."

Ennis looked at the engine, contemplating. "It ain't in good shape, might take a day or two," he said. He closed the hood then turned to the man. "I can pay to have it towed into town and get it fixed up."

The man stood there, staring at him for a long moment. "You folks sure are friendly," he said then shook his head. "I can't ask you to do that. I can pay for it."

"You'd probably be better off gettin' something new."

"Can't afford it with the pay I'm gettin'," the man said. "Aguirre's gonna kick my ass." He cursed under his breath, glaring at the truck.

"You're gonna work for Aguirre?"

The man nodded. "Have been the last few years," he said. "Can't get anything better unless I head down to Texas for the rodeo and try to earn some winnings." He shook his head, still upset about the truck.

"I can give ya a ride up to Signal."

The man placed his hands on his hips. "That's okay," he said. "I've probably got you doin' enough for me." He looked over his shoulder, back toward town. "Think I'll stick around town and see if they can fix up my truck."

"It'd be a long wait," Ennis said, walking back to his truck. "Might have to accept that your truck's done for."

"Can't know that for sure 'til it happens."

"I'll give ya a ride back," Ennis said, opening the truck door and climbing in. The man got in.

"I'm Jack Twist, by the way," the man said, holding his hand out to Ennis.

Ennis looked at him. "Ennis," he said, shaking Jack's hand before starting the truck.

There was a smirk on Jack's face. "Your folks just stop at Ennis?"

"Del Mar," Ennis said as he turned the truck around and headed back into town.

His day was alread turning out better. 


	3. Surprise Guest

Ennis stuck around until Jack got his truck towed into town then headed home after bidding a rather reluctant farewell. He would rather stick around Jack a bit longer than go home to his wife, who was probably fuming that he wasn't home with everything she had asked him to get yet. Hopefully she wouldn't yell in front of the girls. She usually made sure that didn't happen.

He parked the truck at the house then grabbed the bags and headed up the stairs, pausing when he saw Alma waiting at the door, arms crossed. It was clear she was trying to hold back her anger, but her nostrils flared just a bit and those eyes stared at him as if she was sucking the life right out of him with just that stare. He didn't say anything as he stepped past her and headed inside.

Ennis put the bags on the kitchen table then went to greet the girls as Alma put the groceries away. They told him about their trip to the doctor and how much fun it was. He looked over at Alma as he listened to the girls, seeing her standing there watching them. She looked like she had cooled down a bit. He still wasn't sure he wanted to face her alone though.

That choice was made for him when Alma told the girls to go play in their room.

Ennis got to his feet, taking off his jacket and hanging it on the hook by the door, followed by his hat. He could feel Alma's eyes on his back. "You didn't give me a specific time to get back," he said without turning to her.

"It shouldn't have taken you that long-"

"I got sidetracked."

"By what?"

"I had to help someone out with car trouble," Ennis said, turning and walking past her. He walked into the kitchen, grabbing a beer from the fridge. "It was the neighborly thing to do," he added when she followed him.

"You should be glad nothin' went bad."

"Didn't get nothin' that would."

Alma sighed, pushing her tempter tantrum back as she walked over to the sink to wash the few dishes that were still out. She did so in silence, keeping her back to him. Ennis opened his beer then went back into the living room.

The next day, things went back into the routine. And Ennis was glad to be back out on the ranch, working. Sitting in the house all day wasn't good for him. His thoughts kept roaming to a certain Jack Twist. Would the two of them be friends right now if Ennis had actually gone up to work for Aguirre in '63?

Ridiculous thoughts.

Ennis got home, tired and sweaty and looking forward to a hearty supper. He hung his hat and jacket up then started for the kitchen, freezing before he stepped any further inside.

Alma was sitting at the kitchen table but stood when he walked in. "Look who dropped by for supper," she said, gesturing to their guest. Who was none other than the same man that had been on Ennis' mind all day.

Jack turned in his seat to look at Ennis. "Hi."

Ennis felt a bit self-concious standing there, smelly and dirty. He had the crazy thought that he wanted to look presentable in Jack's presence, not knowing that the thoughts going through Jack's mind was that Ennis looked just fine the way he was.

"I'll go see if the girls are hungry," Alma said, turning and leaving the room.

Leaving Ennis alone with Jack.

There was silence for a long moment. Mostly because Ennis was just the strong, silent type. He walked over to the sink and washed up without saying a word. He could feel Jack's eyes on him the entire time. He walked over to the table and sat down, shifting slightly when he felt his knee press up against Jack's.

"They're hopin' my truck'll be ready in another couple of days," Jack said, breaking the silence. He propped his arms on the table. "Had to go back to that store to find out where you live. I keep thinkin' 'bout payin' ya back somehow."

"Don't worry 'bout it," Ennis said with a slight shake of his head.

"Still," Jack leaned back and reached into his pocket then placed some money down on the table in front of Ennis, who leaned back away from it. "It ain't much, but I'll eventually pay it all back."

Ennis shook his head and pushed the money back over to Jack. "You need that more'n I do," he said. "And you don't have to worry about payin' me back."

"There's gotta be at least somethin' I can do for you."

"Say hi to Joe Aguirre for me."

Before anything else could be said, Alma returned with the girls then put supper on the table. Ennis ate in silence, listening to Alma and Jack talking about what happened and how Ennis had helped him out a lot. Ennis couldn't help but notice the fact that Jack was sitting in a position where Ennis couldn't help but touch knees with him. And every touch sent Ennis' mind spinning with something he didn't understand.

And, frankly, didn't want to explore.

"Only bad thing is," Jack was saying, sending a slight smirk Ennis' way. "He won't let me pay him back."

"Why not?" Alma asked, looking over at Ennis. Of course she would agree that Jack should pay him back. After all, it had been THEIR money that was paying to get Jack's truck fixed up.

Ennis realized that all the attention was on him now. He lifted his head and shrugged his shoulders. "I was just bein' friendly," he said. "Makin' him pay me back just don't feel right."

"Yeah, but, you ain't makin' me, bud," Jack said, his eyes on Ennis. "How 'bout I take you out for a drink?"

"You don't gotta do nothin'," Ennis said, grabbing his plate and standing up. He walked over to the sink, looking down at the food that was left on his plate, hearing Alma speaking softly to Jack. He couldn't make out what she was saying, but the money that had been left on the table was now in her pocket and safely tucked away.

"Great food," Jack said once supper was over. "Might come over again tomorrow."

"Glad to have you," Alma said. She took the girls into the other room.

Ennis leaned against the counter, hands in his pockets. "Got a good place to stay while you're in town?" he asked.

Jack nodded his head. "And at a more decent price than that mechanic," he said with a smile. "How 'bout that drink?"

Ennis opened his mouth to say something then Alma walked in, hearing everything that had been said. "Go on and get that drink," she told her husband. "You might need it."

Ennis looked at her then back at Jack, who was just standing there patiently waiting. "All right," he said, pushing away from the counter. He walked past Jack and grabbed his jacket.

"Don't stay out too late," Alma said as both men headed out the door. 


	4. Paid Back

It was dark out as Ennis followed Jack inside the bar. This wasn't too rowdy a town, so there was only a few other people sitting in the bar. They were talking loudly, but no one was turning it into a fight. Ennis sat down at the bar with Jack as Jack ordered and paid for their drinks. Their drinks were set down in front of them a moment later.

"So," Jack said after a moment of silence. "You mentioned Joe Aguirre." He took a drink of his beer then turned his head and looked over at Ennis. "You know 'im?"

Ennis nodded his head. "Nearly worked for him back in '63," he said, looking over at Jack, noticing a flash of recognition cross his face.

Jack nodded, setting his glass down. "Aguirre was pissed you didn't show," he said. "Put me through hell cuz, sayin' ranch stiffs ain't no good." He shrugged his shoulders, looking down at his glass. "Pretty rough year, but seein' as how I was all on my own up there, I did pretty damn good."

"Sorry I wasn't up there."

Jack looked at him. "What kept you?"

"Alma," Ennis replied. "Wanted to get married and her folks were throwin' job offers at me." He shook his head, shifting in his seat. "Probably should've went up there anyway."

"Yeah."

Ennis glanced over at Jack, hearing something in the other's voice that he couldn't distinguish. Jack was staring down into his glass. Ennis scratched his head and looked back forward, unsure what to say. He couldn't help but wonder what his life would be like now if he had gone up to work for Aguirre on Brokeback Mountain. Would he still have ended up in the same spot he was stuck in now? Because he wasn't the sort of guy to break off something when he had promised Alma. He had been taught that marriage was for life.

"But, you've got a good life for yourself," Jack said as if the silence hadn't come between them. "Wife, kids, a good job. Me? I'm still stuck livin' with my parents up in Lightning Flat."

"How come you haven't left?" Ennis asked. "You talked about goin' down to Texas."

Jack shrugged his shoulders. "Ain't nothin' for me here, ain't nothin' for me there," he said. He picked up his glass. "At least, that's how I feel." He downed the rest of his drink.

"Might feel different if you get up and go."

"My folks would love that," Jack said. "There's always tryin' to get me out and go do somethin'. Only reason why I keep workin' for Aguirre year after year." He shook his head. "Tired of that, but can't do nothin' else."

"Besides go to Texas."

Jack nodded his head. "I'll probably still feel like there's somethin' missin' though," he said, taking a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket.

Ennis looked down at his glass. He could relate to how Jack felt. He had been feeling that way for as long as he could remember. He did have a pretty good life, but his life wasn't going anywhere further. He would be stuck doing the same routine for the rest of his life.

Jack lit a cigarette then just sat there playing with the lighter for a little while. "You like your life?" he asked, looking over at Ennis.

Out of habit, Ennis nodded his head, grimacing inside. He shifted on the stool again then looked over at Jack. "I'm settled where I am," he said, knowing that that didn't mean he was happy. "Better than what I had before."

"Your folks run you off?"

Ennis shook his head. "They've been long gone for a while," he said. "Brother and sister raised me. Mostly. Until they both got married and left, leaving me with nothing." He shrugged. "Thought I'd make somethin' of my life with Alma."

"Ain't happy there?"

Ennis knew he was getting too close to causing some sort of trouble. He knew the people in this bar. If they overheard him talking about how unhappy he was with Alma, it might reach her ears and cause him hell.

"Sorry," Jack said, obviously noticing something in Ennis' expression. "Didn't mean to pry. Ain't none of my business."

Ennis couldn't help but feel like he wanted to tell Jack everything. Maybe it was just the fact that he wanted to get it all off his chest. Maybe then he could finally feel happy since he'd no longer have to hold back so much. Until more was built up to add in the place of the other.

"It ain't that," Ennis said, looking at Jack. His words surprised himself. Jack was just a stranger. It shouldn't be right to talk to him about all of this, but wouldn't it feel right to open up about it? He couldn't do it with anyone in town. They would go straight to Alma if they overheard anything.

"Not the place for it?" Jack asked, guessing Ennis' reasons. He gave a slight smile. "I understand, don't worry." The lighter clicked as he flipped it open and closed. "Maybe we'll have time to go somwhere-"

"I got work in the mornin'," Ennis said, getting to his feet. Part of him was saying that he was willing to go anywhere with Jack for a chat. The other part of him-the main part-was telling him to run away because he didn't understand what was going through his mind right now. "I think I better head back home."

"You sure?" Jack asked. "You just had the one drink."

"Consider it as payin' me back," Ennis said. "Thanks for the drink." He turned and left the bar.

Jack sat there at the bar, not understanding what had just happened. Had he said something wrong? He hadn't meant to run Ennis off like that. He had only tried to be friendly.

Maybe a little TOO friendly, it seemed like.

Jack put out the cigarette, slipping the lighter back into his pocket. He thanked the bartender then turned and left the bar, stepping out into the cool night. He breathed in a lungful of fresh air then turned and headed back to the hotel.

Just like the night before, his dreams consisted of a certain ranch hand... 


	5. Offer

Ennis was on his way to work the next morning when something got his attention. He pulled the truck over and got out, hearing the shouts more clearly this time. He remained standing by his truck as Jack stormed outside. Apparently he hadn't got good news about his truck. Ennis opened the door of his truck to get in before Jack noticed him, but something stopped him. He turned his head and saw Jack looking his way. He closed the door as Jack walked over.

"Ain't nice to spy," Jack said with a grin on his face. He acted as if nothing had gone wrong only minutes before.

"I wasn't," Ennis said. He nodded back toward the garage. "Everything fine there?"

The grin on Jack's face was gone. "My truck ain't worth shit, so they're junkin' it," he said. "Can't get it up and runnin', so I don't have transportation." He shook his head, turning away from Ennis, hands on his hips. "Aguirre's really gonna..." He trailed off, muttering something unintelligable.

"When do you gotta get up there?" Ennis asked.

Jack looked at Ennis. "About two days ago would've been better," he said. "I might still have something if I get there today."

Ennis shrugged his shoulders, slipping his hands into his jacket pockets. "I can give you a ride up there," he said, knowing he'd get in trouble for skipping work, but it wouldn't hurt, would it? They couldn't afford to let him go.

"And give me another reason to pay ya back?"

"Not somethin' you have to worry about," Ennis said. "I'm just doin' the nice thing."

"Your wife won't kick your ass for takin' off like that?"

"I'll let her know," Ennis said. Talking to her about it would be hard, but he could probably tell her that Jack would pay them back for the trip. That would be good enough for her. That is, if he got the balls to lie.

"I don't know," Jack said. "I'd hate to be a bother."

"All I gotta do is drop you off and come right back," Ennis said. "Ain't that big a deal."

"You sure?"

Ennis nodded. "You ain't gonna find another ride," he said. "Or find any vehicle to borrow 'round here."

"Well...all right, then," Jack said. He gestured down the street. "I gotta check out and get my things. I'll meet you at your place in a bit."

"All right," Ennis said then got in the truck as Jack walked off. He headed back home and parked, not getting out of the truck at first. Alma would definitely fuss at him for not going to work like he should.

Ennis shook his head then got out of the truck and headed inside. Alma was in the kitchen washing dishes. Just like he expected, she asked why he wasn't at work right now. "Somethin' came up," he said.

Alma paused then turned away from the sink, grabbing a towel and drying her hands. "Like what?"

"I'm gonna give Jack a ride up to Signal," Ennis said. "His truck's had it and he's got no other way up there."

"Can't he call Aguirre to come pick him up?"

"This way's easier."

"The warden-"

"He can fuss at me when I get back," Ennis said. "Which might be late tonight or sometime in the mornin'." If he was smart, he'd keep on driving and never come back home to Alma, but he did love his two little girls. He couldn't abandon them like that.

Alma sighed, obviously realizing there was no way she was talking him out of this. "Well, drive safe," she said. "And tell Jack hi for me."

Ennis nodded then turned and headed back outside. It wasn't too much longer after that that Jack showed up. He put his things in the back of the truck then got in. Ennis got in then pulled out and headed down the road. 


	6. Planted Friendship

The sky was cloudy when they arrived in Signal. Ennis parked outside of Joe Aguirre's trailer/office. It was strange to be here, knowing that he hadn't come up here for a job a few years back. He was hoping he wouldn't get noticed by Aguirre. The last thing he needed was to get yelled at. He got enough of that from his wife and boss at the ranch.

"Thanks for the ride," Jack said, opening the door. He looked over at Ennis. "I, uh..." He stumbled over his words for a moment then got out of the truck without saying anything. He grabbed his bag from the back.

Ennis watched as Jack walked over to the trailer and step inside. He thought about going ahead and leaving, but the least he could do was stay and see if everything turned out okay here. It had been a pretty silent trip up here, but when they did say something, Ennis felt as if he was gaining a friend in Jack. Jack didn't grill him to talk like Alma did all of the time. He let Ennis say what he wanted when he wanted.

But, Ennis hadn't said much because he didn't know what was going to come out.

He turned off the truck with a sigh. The breeze blew in through the open windows, giving him a slight chill. It was quiet in the town. He lit a cigarette then propped his arm on the door. He was starting to think that he should head home in the morning instead of tonight. He felt like he really needed this time away from home. Alma and his job were getting stressful. He needed this time away.

Ennis turned his head when he heard shouts and curses coming from the trailer. He recognized Jack's voice easily. He was the louder one. Ennis put the cigarette out as the door to Aguirre's trailer flung open and Jack stepped out, slamming the door closed behind him. He kicked at the dirt, fuming as he paced back and forth for a few minutes before he stopped and realized that Ennis was still sitting there in his truck. Ennis looked forward as Jack walked over.

Jack propped his arms on the door. "Well," he said, sounding like he hadn't cooled down all of the way. "He gave the job to someone else since I didn't show." He shook his head, cursing under his breath as he looked over his shoulder.

"So..." Ennis started, looking at Jack. "What's next for you?"

Jack looked at him then shrugged his shoulders, lowering his arms. "I don't know," he said, resting his hands on his hips. "Might go down to Texas after all. Or remain stuck at my daddy's place."

Ennis looked at the steering wheel, needing something to occupy himself. "I could find you somethin' temporary down in Riverton," he said, looking back at Jack. "It'd get you some money to get your start down in Texas."

Jack just stood there for a moment as if thinking over Ennis' offer. "I don't know," he said. "I don't wanna put you through that trouble-"

"Won't be."

Jack already looked like he was in a better mood. "Well, I'll think about it," he said. "I'll need to call my folks and see what's goin' on over there first." He placed his hand on the truck door and pointed at Ennis with the other. "Better accept me payin' ya back if I do go through with this."

"Just doin' the neighborly thing."

Jack nodded then lowered his hands. "You gonna head back today?" he asked.

Ennis looked at the clouds as if the bad weather would keep him from traveling. He shook his head. "I'm gonna wait 'til mornin'," he said, looking back at Jack. "It'd get me home at a better time."

"I know a good motel that ain't far from here," Jack said. He grabbed his bag then walked around the truck and got in. "I'll pay for it and I ain't takin' no for an answer. You won't let me do anything else."

Ennis looked forward and started the truck. "You haven't offered to do anything else," he said, not knowing that his words could be taken in an entirely different meaning. He pulled out and drove down the street to the motel Jack talked about.

After Jack booked a room for Ennis, he took Ennis out for another drink later that evening. Ennis had called Alma to let him know he was staying the night. She wasn't too happy, but there was nothing she could do. Jack had called his folks and got fussed at for showing up late. They wouldn't listen to his complaints about the truck. They just blamed him for not getting the job. He wasn't in too good a mood when he joined Ennis at the bar.

Ennis looked over at Jack as he sat down beside him, ordering a refill. "Everything okay?"

Jack shook his head, picking up his glass. "I don't know why I haven't left yet," he said. "Guess it's fate for me to deal with bullshit from everybody." He took a drink then paused and looked at Ennis. "Not from you, though."

Ennis gave a nod of his head, looking back forward. "Made me a little worried there," he said, seeing Jack grin out of the corner of his eye. He didn't know why that made him feel good. It seemed like anything would make Jack smile and Ennis wanted to do that. It was confusing. He SHOULDN'T be feeling this way.

"So," Jack said, shifting in his seat a little. The movement brushed his leg against Ennis' and Ennis sat up a little straighter, making sure they were no longer touching. "What's the life of Ennis Del Mar like?"

Ennis glanced at Jack once. "Pretty normal," he said. He took a drink of his beer. "Not too interestin' when you live the same routine every single day."

"I know how that feels like," Jack said with a nod of agreement. "Ever feel like you just wanna run away?"

Ennis nodded. "Sometimes," he said. "When I don't think about my girls." Confessing about how shitty his life was felt easy when he was telling all to Jack.

"So there IS a problem with the wifey."

"She's not really a problem," Ennis said. Even if he knew he didn't love her, he still felt like he should defend her when someone said something disrespectful about her. She didn't deserve that kind of thing. "She just doesn't..." He trailed off, not knowing what he was going to say.

"She don't understand?" Jack guessed. His eyes had never left Ennis. It made Ennis feel a bit self-concious, but it also made him feel good. Someone was giving him attention instead of expecting his attention on them at all times as if they mattered more than him. Jack just made him feel important and not left out.

Ennis shrugged his shoulders. "We don't talk," he said. "When we do it usually turns into an argument. I don't know what she understands other than the fact that she wants a perfect life and she thinks she has it."

"What do you want?"

Ennis looked over at Jack, losing himself in that blue-eyed gaze for just a moment. "I don't know," he said with a shake of his head as he looked away from Jack. "I just feel like there should be something more to my life than what I've got now." He wasn't about to say something about the fact that that feeling was fulfilled somewhat whenever he was in Jack's presence.

"I'm right there with ya, bud," Jack said, beer in his hand. He took a long swig. "Maybe that'll change down in Texas."

"I really hope you find what you're lookin' for down there, Jack," Ennis said, though part of him didn't want to know that Jack would be leaving for Texas at some point. He had only known the man for a couple of days. He shouldn't be thinkin this way. He would certainly keep a tight hold on those thoughts. Letting any of them stray might kill him.

"Thanks," Jack said.

They talked off and on for the next couple of hours. They got to know a little bit more about each others lives. Ennis was still a bit wary about talking about Alma even way out here in Signal, but Jack still knew that Ennis didn't love Alma at all. And he didn't even have to say it. It was obvious in the way he talked about her. But, he loved his two girls to death. They were the only happy points in Ennis' life that Jack could see.

Later that night, as Jack lay awake in his room at the hotel, he couldn't stop thinking about Ennis. And about how much they had in common. Especially the fact that they both felt as if there was something incredibly big missing from their life. If they had met in '63, would that feeling still be there?

Or was Jack the thing that had been missing from Ennis' life all these years? 


	7. Watered Friendship

They had gotten back to Riverton at a good time the next day, making plans on the trip back. Ennis had offered to ask about something on the ranch for Jack, but Jack didn't seem too interested in that sort of thing, so Ennis just promised he'd ask around town and see if anybody needed an extra hand with anything and pay a good price.

Ennis dropped Jack off then headed home to an unhappy Alma. He hung up his hat and jacket, hearing Alma storming about the house. He could hear the girls playing in their room. Hopefully Alma wouldn't start yelling at him. Now that he was home, she could display how unhappy she was about him staying overnight somewhere and leaving her with "no warning" as she would say.

He didn't know how to bring up asking her about Jack staying here with them for a few days.

Alma looked at him when he stepped into the living room. She was picking up the girl's toys and straightening up the place. At least she hadn't taken her anger out on the girls, but he didn't see her do something like that. He didn't say anything as he stood there. She would just cut him off if he tried to say anything anyway. It was better for him just to stay quiet until she blew off some steam.

Alma looked down at the toys in her hands then at him. "Did things go okay in Signal?" she asked, cradling the toys in her arms.

"Jack wasn't able to get that job for Aguirre," Ennis said. She looked angrier than she sounded. Maybe she didn't want to upset the girls by raising her voice. "I'm gonna help him get somethin' temporary here until he gets enough money to head down to Texas."

"Why can't he just borrow the money?"

"I don't want him to think he has to pay me back all the time."

"Won't he feel that way when you find him a job?"

"He'll look on his own, too," Ennis said. "I just told him to mention that I recommended him and-"

"Where's he gonna stay?"

"I was thinkin' here for about a week."

Alma sighed then left the room. When she came back, the toys were gone. "We don't have room for guests," she said. "The house is a mess. I-"

"Jack can sleep on the couch," Ennis said. He gestured around. "The house ain't a mess. It was a bigger mess when he was over for dinner the other night. He don't mind. He won't think-"

"What about the hotel?"

"I'm tryin' to help him get money, not lose it."

"Ennis-" She stopped when there was a knock at the door. She looked at him, obviously thinking that she knew who was standing at the door right now.

Ennis turned and went to answer the door. When he opened it, he wasn't surprised to see Jack standing there. "C'mon in," he said, stepping back and gesturing inside. Jack walked inside, his arm brushing against Ennis' as he walked past Ennis.

He clamped down on his thoughts about that touch. He closed the door then walked back into the living room with Jack. Alma and Jack greeted each other. Alma's sour mood was abruptly gone.

"I asked around town about any kind of job and I got somethin' at a store, sweepin' and stockin' shelves and all that," Jack said. He looked at Ennis. "Mentioning that I knew you did a lot of good." He looked at Alma. "I appreciate ya lettin' me stay here."

Silence descended. Ennis shifted his weight from one foot to the other as Jack looked at him, obviously picking up on the mood that that hadn't been decided yet. Ennis opened his mouth to say something but Alma beat him to it.

"No problem, Jack," Alma said. "You can stay for as long as you like." Maybe she was hoping that Jack would do his share of the chores around here. Ennis was pretty sure that Jack would do so only to thank them for letting him stay.

But, Ennis was starting to think that maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Alma wasn't exactly making Jack feel welcome here. He was probably better off staying at the motel. And Ennis had the strange feeling about staying under the same roof as Jack. He didn't understand the feeling, but only knew that he shouldn't be worried about it.

Jack didn't seem to have any problem with sleeping on the couch. He got along well with the girls immediately. Ennis was more comfortable with the idea of Jack staying here as the day wore on.

And as he laid in bed that night, trying to get to sleep, his thoughts drifted to Jack sleeping not too far away. He drifted off to sleep then woke with a start when his dream turned into Jack in his arms rather than Alma. He didn't know where that came from and didn't get back to sleep for a long time after that. 


	8. Blooming Friendship

One week turned into a few more days, which turned into another week. Pretty soon, Jack had been staying with them for about a month. He even went along with Ennis to work when he didn't have anything else to do a time or two. Ennis found those days at work more enjoyable. He liked spending time with Jack. He could talk more with Jack, but he still felt clamped up about most things because of what was on his mind all of the time whenever he was with Jack.

They went out for drinks nearly every night. Jack did most of the talking whenever they hung out and never seemed to have a problem with that. He didn't seem to ever have a problem with anything. Even when Alma didn't even try to hide the fact that she didn't like him staying there for so long. She shouldn't complain since Jack did his share of the work around the house, but she did so anyway. Ennis and Alma hardly ever went to bed without having an argument first. Ennis wasn't the type of person to come right out and tell her to shut up and deal with it. Because he wasn't about to ask Jack to leave.

Though Jack probably had enough money to go to Texas and back by now.

After a rough week at work, Ennis had gotten a few days off, so he was sleeping late. Alma got out of bed quietly, not waking him as she dressed then headed into the kitchen. She grimaced at Jack sleeping on the couch. He had been a nice guest that first week, but now he was just over staying his welcome. Why wasn't he just leaving?

She put a quick breakfast together then got the girls up and dressed. She left Ennis alone. He'd probably feel better after sleeping a little longer. When she walked back into the kitchen, Jack was up and helping himself to a cup of coffee. Alma got the girls some breakfast without even looking at or talking to Jack. He either didn't mind or didn't even notice.

"I'm gonna take the girls to the store with me," Alma said, looking at Jack. "You can let Ennis know if he wakes up before I get back. Let him sleep."

"Yes, ma'am," Jack said with a nod of his head. He never sounded as if he enjoyed being polite with her. She didn't care. Especially since she had stopped trying to be nice around him.

Clearly she had failed with scaring him off a month ago by doing so.

Alma nodded her head then said nothing more. Once the girls ate, she left with them. Jack washed the dishes just to see if he could try and at least make Alma somewhat happy. He felt sorry for Ennis having to deal with the woman all the time. She would definitely be the reason Jack would pack up and run away from here as fast as he could. Why had Ennis stuck around her?

Jack dried his hands then put the towel down. He checked the door then looked out the window then turned and headed down the hall to Ennis and Alma's bedroom. The door was halfway open. Jack slowly stepped forward and pushed the door open more, wincing inwardly at the creak it made. But, Ennis didn't stir.

Ennis was lying on his stomach on the bed, the blanket halfway off and exposing his bare back. Jack admired the strong, rugged back. He wondered what it would feel like to run his hands over that tanned skin...

He and Ennis had gotten pretty close over the last month. It was safe to say that they were friends. Ennis still didn't talk that much, but when he did, he always had something to say as if he had been holding it in and was relieved to finally have it off his chest. He still didn't say anything bad about Alma, though the bitch probably deserved it.

Of course, Jack wouldn't say anything about Alma to Ennis, who was a bit touchy when it came to that subject. Jack had once tried to slip in a suggestion that Ennis pack up and leave her, but Ennis talked about his two girls as if they were his entire world. Leaving them would break his heart. So, Jack had shut up about it.

But, there was a way to leave Alma and still be able to see his girls.

Jack took half a step back when Ennis shifted in his sleep, not waking up. Jack hesitated a moment then stepped inside the bedroom. He had been alone with Ennis before, but never like this. Was it selfish for Jack to think he was tired of playing the 'friend' game? He couldn't exactly tell what Ennis wanted, but it was definitely not Alma and Ennis always seemed happier around Jack.

He walked over to the bed, still being as quiet as he could. He stood there for a moment then reached over and slowly ran his hand along Ennis' back. His skin was warm to the touch and Jack ran both of his hands along Ennis' back, massaging those strong muscles. Ennis moaned in his sleep, his back flexing beneath Jack's palms. Jack lightly dragged his fingernails down Ennis' back, getting an even more satisfying moan out of Ennis.

Jack left the room when Ennis muttered something then stretched as he woke up. Jack went back into the kitchen, wondering what was going to happen in the next few minutes.

Ennis woke up in an empty bed. He rubbed his eyes then ran his fingers through his hair as he sat up. He looked around then got up to take a shower and dress. As he headed for the kitchen, he then noticed how quiet things were. Where were the girls?

He stopped in the kitchen. Jack was sitting at the table, eating toast. Ennis got himself a cup of coffee then sat down at the table with a sigh.

Jack looked over at him. "Alma took the girls with her to the store," he said. "Sleep well?"

Ennis looked at Jack then nodded his head. "Yeah," he said, thinking back to the dream he had had last night. He couldn't remember what had happened in that dream but he did remember Jack being there somewhere. He took a drink of his coffee. "Got any work today?"

Jack turned in his seat so he could face Ennis more. "I've been thinkin' about that," he said. "And I've been thinkin' that maybe it's time I head outta here. I've been putting it off for too long. At this rate I'll never get to Texas."

Ennis set his coffee cup down, unsure of how to feel about this. "When were you thinkin' 'bout leaving?"

Jack shrugged his shoulders. "Sometime this week, maybe," he said. "Most likely this weekend."

"Oh," Ennis said, finding something more interesting by staring at his coffee.

"And since you've got some time off," Jack said. "I was, maybe, thinkin'-" He stopped when the door opened and Alma and the girls walked in. Jack went back to eating his toast, but Ennis never looked away from him.

Alma kissed Ennis on the cheek. "Get enough sleep?" she asked. He replied with just a nod. She turned to put things away while the girls ran off to their room to play.

"Alma," Jack said, standing to his feet when she turned to him. "Would you mind if I borrow Ennis for today? He's had a tough week at work and I thought I'd treat him to something."

"Well-"

"I think it'd be best if I got out of the house and not worry 'bout work," Ennis said, looking over at Alma. She looked at him then just sighed without saying anything. He got to his feet then followed Jack out the door. 


	9. Something

They ended up driving a few miles out of town and parking on the side of the road to just sit there and enjoy the breeze, the sunshine, and the quiet. Ennis took in a deep breath, wishing all of his days could be like this, but he didn't like in a fantasy world. This was the real world. A world where he had to face reality and live the life he had been handed. Whether he liked that life or not. If he slacked or changed his mind about anything, the people around him would get the worst out of it and he just couldn't do that.

Especially since if he ever changed his life, Jack Twist would be an important part of that.

And THAT was against everything everywhere.

"Sorry I couldn't take ya anywhere interesting," Jack said, breaking the silence. He looked over at Ennis. "Ain't a lot of that in this town." He smiled, feeling butterflies in his stomach when Ennis returned it. "Ever think about goin' down to Texas for the rodeo?"

"There's rodeoes in other places besides Texas," Ennis said, glancing at Jack before looking back forward at the wide, open area. He could hear vehicles driving up and down the road behind them. Part of him worried about sitting here with Jack like this. "Don't got the time to go anywhere."

"That damn job is drainin' you dry," Jack said. "You'd probably be happier if you just up and quit."

Ennis shook his head. "I got a family to provide for," he said.

"Don't Alma got a job?"

Ennis gave a slight nod of his head. "I'm the man, I'm the provider," he said, feeling as if he was just making up excuses. Whenever he was with Jack, he constantly doubted everything he had been taught growing up. "The job ain't THAT bad."

"Then why'd they give you a few days off?"

Ennis fell silent. He got up then climbed out of the back of the truck and dropped to the ground, kicking up dust in the process. He leaned against the truck and looked around, pulling out a cigarette. He looked at Jack when he held out a lighter. Ennis took it without a word, his fingers briefly touching Jack's. Ennis looked away and lit up, his attention away from Jack as he handed the lighter back.

Jack watched Ennis as they were both silent for what seemed like eternity. He didn't mind the silence as long as he had Ennis to spend it with. It was endurable because he didn't know the right words to say to Ennis without scaring the other man off. And despite the fact that he wanted to jump into what he really wanted, he wanted to respect any choice Ennis made and back off if he had to. He would just have to wait and see what the future brought.

And hope he didn't head for Texas disappointed.

After a few more minutes, Ennis dropped his cigarette and stomped it out then turned to Jack sitting in the back of the truck. "I think I need a drink," he said, wiping the sweat off his forehead. The sun beating down was hot enough for him to want to take off his jacket, but there was still a chilly breeze.

Jack grinned as he hopped out of the truckbed saying, "You alcoholic."

Ennis gave a slight smile then got in the truck. Jack smiled then also got in the truck and a moment later they were heading back into town. It was nearing late afternoon when they pulled up to a bar and parked.

Ennis left his hat in the truck as he got out and followed Jack inside. They got them a drink then went over to a table away from everyone else and sat down. Jack smoked a cigarette hardly touching his beer. Ennis sat there quietly, sipping his drink from time to time.

Jack looked at Ennis. The other man didn't even notice or else didn't react. He wanted to know what was going through Ennis' mind right now, but didn't know how to go about breaching that subject. He would just have to wait and hope that Ennis would eventually open up. He didn't know if it would be for the better for him or not. All this waiting was driving him crazy.

But, it was always harder to wait for someone when the other person didn't even know they were expected to do anything.

Ennis got up a few minutes later and headed to the restroom to take a piss. Jack put his cigarette out then just sat there, tapping his foot with his beer in his hand. He didn't know what he was thinking, if at all, but he stood up suddenly.

And, in the process, bumped into someone behind him, spilling the man's beer and his own. The man stood there, looking down at himself then back at Jack, an evil glare in his eye. Jack remained frozen in place as the man walked off and over to a group of his buddies. Jack set his glass down then headed for the restroom when the men weren't looking.

Ennis was washing his hands when Jack suddenly burst into the room. He opened his mouth to say something then Jack grabbed his arm and pulled him into a stall, locking it and clamping a hand over Ennis' mouth to keep him quiet. Ennis tried to pull away and get some answers, but Jack just pressed him up against the wall of the stall and motioned for him to be quiet.

The door of the restroom creaked open. Jack heard someone say it was empty(without really looking, the idiot). The door closed once again and they were alone in the restroom. Jack breathed a sigh of relief and lowered his hand away from Ennis' mouth.

"What the hell?" Ennis asked, a little perturbed. "What-"

"Let's just say I don't need to be hangin' around this bar for a while," Jack said, realizing he was still standing pressed against Ennis. He backed off, but it was still a small space so he was still practically pressed up against the other.

And Ennis REALLY seemed to be noticing this. "What'd you do?"

"It was an accident," Jack said. "But, no one ever likes gettin' their beer spilled all over 'em." He shrugged his shoulders, making no move to leave the stall. He didn't ignore the fact that Ennis was doing the same whether he knew it or not.

Ennis gave a slight sigh. "They'll get over it," he said then pushed away from the stall wall and reaching for the lock on the door. Jack's hand got their first. Ennis lowered his hand then looked at Jack. "If you think I'm gonna hide out in here with you-"

"They'll see you as an accomplice," Jack said, knowing he was just coming up with excuses to remain in this moment longer. Ignoring the fact that there was a toilet off to his left. "I don't know how, but they will."

Ennis grabbed Jack's hand to pry his fingers off the lock. Jack's other hand came up to grab a handful of Ennis' jacket and the ranch hand froze, his eyes on the now exposed lock instead of Jack.

What was going through his mind...he didn't know. Ennis just felt in his gut that if he walked out right now he would regret it. He wasn't oblivious to the fact that Jack was easing closer to him. Several things were holding him back, but the main thing was the fact that Jack was another man. Men just didn't put themselves into this sort of situation. A fear gripped him because he knew this was a fast way to get killed.

Jack could practically feel that something was bothering Ennis. He pressed Ennis back against the wall, not getting too close but still pressing close to the other. Ennis kept his hands at his sides mostly because he wouldn't know what to do with them. Why wasn't he fighting this? Anyone could walk in.

"Jack," Ennis whispered, closing his eyes as he felt Jack's breath against his neck, his hand moving slowly down his chest. He squirmed slightly, feeling something pressing against his leg.

"What do you want, Ennis?" Jack asked, knowing he wouldn't get any sort of straight answer out of the other, but he just wanted to hear his voice. Whisper his name. Feel his touch.

"I need to get home," Ennis said, knowing that anywhere else was better than being right here. What he WANTED, of course, was saying something completely different and he didn't want to explore no matter how badly he WANTED to. He didn't know what was going on in his head anymore and that scared him.

"Fuck," Ennis mumbled, opening his eyes as Jack got his belt unfastened. Jack slid down to his knees in front of Ennis. Slowly, Jack unfastened Ennis' jeans. Ennis looked down at Jack and found that he couldn't look away.

Jack looked up at Ennis once before tugging his jeans down. Ennis' cock was right in his face now. Jack could feel Ennis trembling. He moved his hand up and under Ennis' shirt, caressing his stomach and chest, doing his best to sooth him. With his other hand, he grasped Ennis' cock, feeling it harden beneath his fingers. He started to stroke him, hearing Ennis exhale a silent moan.

Unsure if he was even doing this right, Jack took Ennis into his mouth. It wasn't TOO pleasant, but the noises coming from Ennis was well worth it. Jack soon got a rhythm going, holding Ennis still when the ranch hand bucked his hips against Jack's movements.

Jack's hands explored what he could of Ennis' body as he moved up and down Ennis' length. Ennis enjoyed each and every touch, giving equally satisfied moans. He was careful not to be too loud which quickened Jack's pace to get this over with as soon as possible since they were in a restroom at a bar.

With a groan of pleasure and surprise, Ennis came. Jack took it all then looked up at Ennis, who had his face covered with his hands. Jack stood up and Ennis pulled up his jeans, fixing himself. He looked at Jack for a moment then stepped out of the stall. Jack followed him out.

They left the bar, silent. 


	10. Excuses

Jack was surprised when he wasn't kicked out of the house. He had obviously read Ennis pretty well in that moment in the restroom. He had wanted it just as much as Jack had. Where it would go from there, he didn't know. All he knew was that he didn't regret letting it happen. Sure, WHERE it had happened, but nothing else. He was constantly thinking about the many ways he could have made it better and none of those ways had a bathroom involved.

Unfortunately, they didn't have time to talk about what had happened. As soon as they got back to the house, Alma had Ennis doing a lot of things for her. Jack volunteered to pitch in, but Alma refused quite rudely. So, he spent his time sitting in the living room, watching the two girls play with their dolls. In his own mind he could admit that he didn't really like them since they were the only thing holding Ennis where he was right now. Things would surely be different then.

Ennis didn't have a lot of time to think about Jack before Alma had him running around with errands. He didn't know why she hadn't got any of this done while he had been gone. Maybe she had just been mad that he had made the decision to go when she hadn't wanted him to. So, she was therefor punishing him for it. He didn't talk back to her. He knew better than to do that. Even though he was constantly talking back to her in his head. None of the words came out because it was easier for him to deal with her in silence.

So he dealt with her in silence for the rest of the day.

Ennis got in bed after Alma was already asleep. He had made sure the girls were tucked in then made sure not to think about Jack sleeping only a couple of rooms away. He lay in bed, probably as far away from Alma as he could get. He lay there, staring up at the ceiling, unable to go to sleep. He now had time to think about the events of the day and the past month. About Jack. In the silence of his own head in the quiet of the night, he let his mind wander to places he wouldn't have at any other time.

He closed his eyes, imagining Jack in his head. His breath against his neck. His body against his own. His hands...

Ennis opened his eyes, an ache in his chest that he couldn't explain. He took a few deep breaths, but couldn't stop his pounding heart. He tried to push all thoughts of Jack away, but it was just no use. Something had to be done or else he REALLY wouldn't be able to sleep tonight.

Quietly, Ennis got out of bed and crept out of the bedroom, closing the door silently behind him. He turned and walked into the living room, seeing Jack sleeping on the couch. He walked over and knelt down on his knees in front of the couch and gently shook Jack awake.

"Wha...?" Jack trailed off, grumbling. He opened his eyes and looked at him. "Ennis? What time is it?" He looked around as if the room would provide the answer. It was too late to worry about the time anyway.

"What would I have done if I had met you out in the middle of nowhere?" Ennis asked, keeping his voice low. He couldn't stop thinking about 'what if's and they mostly consisted of working for Aguirre a few years ago.

Jack didn't say anything for a long moment as he lay there just staring at Ennis. Then he finally answered. "I wouldn't mind finding out."

Ennis didn't know what to think about Jack displaying these sort of emotions openly. Didn't he realize how dangerous that was? Especially since Ennis' wife was sleeping not too far away? He shouldn't be right here in this moment because it wasn't the way of things. If anyone knew...

He didn't want to think about that right now.

Jack placed his hand on the back of Ennis' neck, sitting up slightly. Ennis didn't move because he didn't know what to do. He closed his eyes and just let it happen, feeling Jack's lips against his own a moment later. It wasn't at all like he thought it would be. He had convinced himself that if he let this happen, he wouldn't want it any longer. It did just the opposite.

Kissing Jack lifted the ache in Ennis' chest. He took Jack's face in his hands, kissing him back as he laid Jack back on the couch, leaning over him. Jack's breath became his own and neither of them could get enough of the other. Jack's hands slowly moved along Ennis' arms, making Ennis crave even more of him. He knew he needed to hold back, but it was just so hard right now.

Alma woke up in the middle of the night to find Ennis gone. She looked around then got out of bed, the door creaking open as she stepped out. She checked on the girls then headed for the living room, stopping when she heard something. She slowly stepped forward then paused at the sight before her.

Ennis was in the living room, leaning over Jack lying on the couch. At first she thought her husband was trying to strangle the man until she saw that they were intimately lip-locked. She couldn't move or do anything as she watched them. Ennis let out a soft moan as Jack's hand slowly moved over his chest. She couldn't comprehend what was happening. All she knew was that Ennis had never handled her in that intimate a way.

She turned and headed back into the bedroom without making a sound. She closed the door behind her, breathing slowly. She held back the tears that threatened to fall. She still didn't know how to process this because this wasn't normal. Her husband shouldn't be in there right now. With a MAN. It just wasn't right.

She crawled back into bed, hoping this was all just a dream. She would wake up in the morning and things would be back to normal.

With a great effort, Ennis broke the kiss and pulled away. Jack followed after him a moment then pulled back, settling back down against the couch. Ennis was clinging to Jack's shirt, feeling Jack's hand still pressed against his chest.

Ennis let go and pulled his hands back away from Jack. "I can't," he said, unable to meet Jack's eyes.

"Not here?" Jack whispered. He moved his hand though Ennis wanted to feel that touch forever.

He didn't know what was going on, but whatever it was, was strong. Ennis couldn't deny that there was something there. Not after this. He just had to be careful with how they dealt with this.

"I gotta get to work tomorrow," Ennis said, quietly.

"You got a few days off."

Ennis finally looked at him. "I'm still goin'," he said, hoping Jack didn't view this as him running away from what was going on here. Technically it was, but he needed time to think things through and he couldn't do that in this house or around Jack.

Jack nodded his head. "I'll still be here when you get back."

"Until you leave this weekend."

Jack didn't have anything to say to that.

"Night, Jack," Ennis said, getting to his feet. He turned and headed back into the bedroom. He closed the door silently behind him, standing there for a moment as he fought the urge to run back out there to Jack. That couldn't happen. Not here. He should be thinking not ANYWHERE, but that wasn't what he wanted.

"Ennis?"

Ennis was pulled out of his thoughts at the sound of Alma's sleepy voice. He turned to her. "Just had to get a drink of water," he said, walking back over to the bed. He crawled in, his back to her.

Alma looked at the back of Ennis' head, thinking about the significance of his words. She held back the tears then rolled over to go back to sleep. She knew it wasn't a dream for sure now. Ennis had lied to her.

How long would it last? 


	11. Falling

Ennis got up the next morning before anyone else and headed out as soon as he could. He felt as if he was running away from everything for good, but knew he would end up back in the same place tonight. Probably feeling the same as he was right now. Which was enduring that deep ache that had arisen inside him ever since...Hell, ever since he met Jack Twist. It only took him this long to realize that it was there.

Would Jack still be there when he got home?

Despite what he had told Jack last night, Ennis didn't go to work. He would get paid for the extra work, but at least he wouldn't get in trouble for not going since it WAS his day off. He ended up driving to the edge of town and just sat there in his truck, feeling the morning breeze blow in through the window. He took a deep breath, telling himself he was getting rid of all of his troubles just with that.

He laid his head back and dozed off.

He woke up about a minute later to the passenger side door opening. He lifted his head just in time to see Jack crawl over and straddle him, their lips crashing together. Hands were everywhere, feeling whatever they could without going too far. But, since they were kissing and Jack was grinding their hips together, it should already be decided that they had gone WAY too far.

Ennis jerked awake at the sound of horns honking. He looked around, relieved that no one was honking at him. Two cars were parked on the side of the road and the people were talking. Ennis shook the dream away then started the truck and turned around and headed back into town. He headed home, turning off the truck. He sat there for a moment, knowing somebody would say something about the fact that he hadn't gone to work today.

Only Jack would. Because Ennis had only told Jack he was going to work today.

Because he had to come to grips with his feelings or forget everything that had happened with Jack. And since that was impossible, he should just accept that this WAS happening. Two men shouldn't-

"God dammit," Ennis muttered under his breath then opened the door and headed up the stairs and into the house. He took off his hat and coat and hung it up then stepped into the kitchen, seeing the girls eating breakfast. Alma was washing the dishes from last night.

Jack wasn't there.

"Uh, where's Jack?" Ennis asked, standing by the table. Was there a change in Alma's stance when he mentioned Jack?

"He was gone when I woke up," Alma replied. She looked over her shoulder at him. "Where'd you get off to? Thought you'd be at work."

"I was goin' to," Ennis said, pulling out a chair at the table and sitting down. "Guess I didn't get enough sleep last night."

"Too much thinkin'?" Alma asked. He could've sworn there was something in her voice just then.

"I guess," Ennis said a bit slowly, wondering what was up with her, but he knew better than to ask. His ass was always on the line whenever he riled her up. It was better to just keep the peace.

Why couldn't he do the same with Jack?

Because with Alma, his life was already set. With Jack...there wasn't much of a life to that. Ennis would still be married and Jack would be gone by the weekend. He'd be in Texas fucking some pretty lady that batted her eyelashes at him...

Damn. If he didn't know better, he would think he was jealous just at the thought of Jack being with somebody else. Was this how Jack felt whenever he saw Ennis with Alma? Or did he know that he had a better chance than Alma?

"You all right, Ennis?"

Ennis looked at Alma, noticing that she had set a plate in front of him along with his coffee. He nodded his head. "Yeah," he said, giving that as his only answer. He pulled his plate a bit closer then started eating.

Alma lingered for a moment longer then turned and walked back over to the sink, clearly trying to hide her anger and broken heart, but obviously Ennis had something else on his mind to keep from seeing the obvious. Well, more like someONE.

Ennis finished his breakfast and just left the plate on the table. He headed outside and sat down on the stairs, waiting for Jack to return. If he was going to. Ennis had himself convinced that he had said something last night that had scared Jack off for good. If Jack really was gone, shouldn't he be relieved? He wouldn't be constantly gripped by fear just by being in Jack's presence. Though, just thinking about Jack was bad enough.

Alma stood at the door, watching Ennis just sit there keeping an eye on the road. He was like a teenager waiting for his crush. Though, that was probably exactly how he was feeling right now. She knew that just by the way her husband had been kissing Jack last night.

She turned away from the door in disgust.

Ennis got to his feet when he saw Jack returning. Jack noticed him standing there and his step faltered a bit before he walked over. Ennis knew this was going to be a bit awkward since Ennis hadn't handled last night all too well.

"I'm leavin' tonight," Jack said. "Just thought you'd know."

Ennis hadn't known what he had been expecting, but he was pretty sure it hadn't been that. He could already feel the pain of separation. He didn't feel guilty when it felt as if he was losing his best friend. That was okay. As long as it didn't go further than that.

"Tonight?" Ennis asked, wishing he could have said something different.

Jack nodded. "Think I've overstayed my welcome a bit-"

"You haven't," Ennis said a bit quickly before he lost his courage. "You get a ride with someone?"

"There's someone headin' down to Texas to visit their folks," Jack said. "They said I could hitch a ride."

Ennis really wished he was the one giving the ride. There was no telling what would happen between here and Texas. Why he was so willing to risk it, he didn't know. He just didn't want to give this up. And if he let Jack leave, he'd be stuck with Alma. Though he already had that.

"Well, uh..." Ennis failed, finding nothing to say. "Last night-"

"You made your intentions clear."

"I don't think you understood those intentions."

" 'I can't' " It took a moment for Ennis to realize that Jack was quoting him. Out of everything that had happened last night, those words were the only thing that stuck in his mind?

"You hafta understand-"

"I understand just fine," Jack said, a little hot under the collar. "You were gonna avoid me all day-"

"I wasn't-"

"You said you were goin' to work," Jack said. "Instead, you just-"

"I'll give you a ride down to Texas."

Those words took them both a little by surprise. Jack shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "You ain't shittin' me?"

"It'd be better than strangers."

"But what about your life?" Jack asked, gesturing to the house. "Your job? You can't just walk out of that."

"I can do whatever I damn well please," Ennis said, catching the hint of a smile on Jack's face. "You're gonna accept my offer or what?"

"I'd be stupid not to," Jack said. "But will Alma be okay with it?"

"She'll get over it."

"This is a new side to you, Mr. Del Mar," Jack said with a grin that really drove Ennis wild. "I like it."

Ennis tried not to dwell on Jack's words. "I gotta get things ready," he said then headed inside with Jack following. He knew a big fight with Alma was coming soon. 


	12. Leaving

Ennis stepped inside, hearing Alma putting the dishes away and the girls playing in the living room. Despite their laughter and happiness, Ennis could feel the stone cold silence that was pratically radiating from his wife. Reminding him that something was up that she wasn't telling him. He couldn't think of any reason for her to be upset with him other than the fact that she was just a cold woman at times when she wanted to be. She probably had a good heart, but it only consisted of the girls. There was no love between husband and wife. He could admit that now and not regret it.

He wasn't about to say it out loud to her, though.

"Alma," Ennis started. She turned, glancing past his shoulder at Jack standing there behind him before focusing back on him. "We gotta talk. You mind if Jack takes the girls outside to play?"

Alma seemed to have a bit of trouble deciding but soon gave in and nodded her head. Ennis stepped aside to let Jack walk past him. Jack headed into the living room and got the girls to follow him outside. They seemed to really like Jack and that gave Ennis a good feeling. What would come out of that, he didn't know.

He waited for the door to close then looked at Alma. He gestured to the table. Without a word she stepped forward and sat down at the table, hands clasped together on her lap. Ennis remained standing. She probably wouldn't remain sitting since it wouldn't take long for her to get angry. And she would let more anger show since the girls weren't around. He probably should have thought about that before he sent them out with Jack, but now it was too late.

"You're leavin' again?" Alma guessed, obviously thinking about when Ennis had given Jack a ride up to Signal to see Aguirre. "Jack is fully capable-"

"It's the least I can do," Ennis said, knowing that cutting her off like that wasn't a good idea. But if she continued to argue his decisions, he would eventually retaliate and say exactly what was on his mind about how he felt. But, he seriously doubted that that would become a reality. He still needed to keep the peace if he wanted to get anything done.

"The least you can do," Alma said with a slight shake of her head. She crossed her arms. "We've given him a home for a MONTH. If anyone needs to get paid back it's us. We don't owe him anything."

"I'm tryin' to be his friend."

"He's probably got enough of those," Alma said, rising to her feet. The chair nearly toppled backwards as she did so. She stepped around the table to face him. "He's capable of gettin' his own ride outta town. You don't need to do anything!"

Ennis was starting to get angry, but told himself to cool down. Everything had consequences and he would have the worse end if he wasn't careful with how he went about this. "I probably won't ever see him again," he said. "I might as well take this chance to see him for just a little longer."

"How do I know you won't stay gone?" Alma asked. There was a deeper meaning behind that question, but he wasn't going to ask. If she wanted him to know, she would tell him.

"Why would I stay gone?" Ennis asked. Even if he didn't love Alma, even she knew that he loved the girls a lot. More than anything, in fact. He wouldn't make sacrifices that would take him away from them. "I'll be back in a few days. And if I'm not-"

"We might as well end it here."

Ennis stood there in silence for a long time, wondering what had brought this on. "Alma-"

"We're not workin', Ennis," Alma said. "Anyone can see that. I talked to Monroe yesterday-"

"Why are you talkin' to other people about our problems?"

"You don't seem to have a problem with talking to Jack about it."

"I haven't said any-"

"Don't sell that bullshit to me, Ennis," Alma said, turning away from him. "You spend hours with him, becomin' buddy-buddy. Y'all come home and he gives me strange looks-"

"I don't know what you're talkin' about."

Alma turned to him, the anger in her voice clear on her face. "Why don't you just go?" she asked. "If you come back, then we'll discuss this further." Clearly when they had time to settle for a divorce. Ennis wasn't too sure how he felt about that.

Did he want that?

"I gotta pack," Ennis said then headed for the bedroom. It didn't take him long at all to toss a few things into a bag, grabbing his toothbrush from the bathroom before he headed out the door, grabbing his jacket and hat. "Girls, your momma wants you."

Junior and Jenny looked at each other than Jack, who was watching Ennis a bit curiously. The girls nodded their heads then did as they were told, running up the stairs and back into the house. Ennis watched them go, feeling Jack's eyes on him.

"I take it the talk with Alma didn't go well."

Ennis looked at Jack. "If we leave now, we can get there at a good time tomorrow," he said, walking over to the truck.

Jack grabbed his back from behind the stairs that he had put there this morning and followed Ennis to the truck. "We gotta tell my ride that I've got a new one," he said, putting his bag in the truckbed beside Ennis's.

"Then we'll stop by there," Ennis said then climbed into the truck. He just wanted to go. Right now, as long as he didn't think about the girls, he wanted to leave and be gone for good. Alma wasn't worth coming back home to.

Jack got into the truck and looked at Ennis. "You okay?"

Ennis didn't answer. He started the truck and pulled out. After a moment, Jack looked away from him, dealing with the silence. They had a long trip. Ennis would eventually open up about everything. 


	13. Fallen

They had driven all day long and made it to Texas late that night with only a few hours to go until they reached Euless, where Jack had named as his destination. They stopped at a hotel for the night to rest after the long trip. A trip that had mostly consisted of silence because Ennis had been brooding over his talk with Alma. Jack had either not noticed or ignored it. He had slept almost the entire way. Ennis had gotten some sleep when they had taken turns driving. Now they were just both tired.

But, when they walked into the room, Ennis found that he couldn't sleep. And wasn't surprised to hear Jack tossing and turning on the other bed.

They were finally completely alone. Ennis would have to be stupid not to notice that. He didn't know how to handle it. Not after the way he had treated Jack all day. They had talked only little during the trip here. And it was never anything of importance. A change to the way their outings had been.

"Ennis?" Jack's voice rose up into the darkness.

Ennis turned his head toward the other bed, barely able to see Jack laying there. "Yeah?"

Jack sat up. Ennis didn't know what to do or say as he watched Jack pull his shirt up over his head. Thankfully it was too dark to see anything. Ennis was nervous just by seeing Jack's silhouette. He looked up at the ceiling when he heard the item of clothing hit the floor.

"We need to talk," Jack said, his voice not too loud. "About last night. And your intentions."

Ennis didn't say anything for a moment then sat up. He looked at Jack when Jack turned on the lamp. For a short moment, Ennis allowed himself to glance at Jack's bare chest before he quickly looked away. "My intentions...I don't know," he said with a shake of his head.

"You suggested this trip, you're gonna talk to me," Jack said, standing up and sitting down on the bed in front of Ennis. "I'm not gonna ask anything about Alma since I can already guess how that went. This trip ain't about her."

Ennis stared down at his hands for a moment. "Last night...and what happened at the bar," he said, looking back at Jack. "It's dangerous. And this thing-"

"This 'thing'?"

"I don't know how to handle it," Ennis said. He had been warring with his emotions ever since he felt Jack's body pressed against his own in that bathroom stall. He was confused because he knew it wasn't right, but it felt like it was where he belonged. "And it'll get us killed."

"We just have to be careful," Jack said. He reached forward and placed his hand on Ennis's arm. "I swear, I'll do anything just as long as we've got something."

Ennis looked down at Jack's hand on his arm then back at Jack. He didn't even bother to try and hide his nervousness. Jack was really the only one he could be himself with. And after the life he lived, he desperately craved that kind of attention. And Jack seemed more than willing to give Ennis anything he wanted. Did the fact that they were two men even bother him?

Jack leaned forward toward Ennis, slowly closing the distance between them. Ennis remembered the kiss last night and how it had lifted that ache in his chest. He closed his eyes as he felt Jack's hand on his cheek, angling his head up slightly. He relaxed just a bit as their lips came together. Ennis' lips parted when he felt Jack's tongue. That was a new sensation, but it was a good one.

Jack laid Ennis back when Ennis' hands explored his chest. Ennis tugged him down so their bodies were pressed together. Jack's arousal was poking out against him and Ennis squirmed a bit, only to get a pleasured moan from Jack.

Their lips finally parted and Jack looked down at him. Ennis watched as Jack moved down, pushing his shirt up and planting kisses on his stomach. Ennis rose up and Jack pulled off his shirt. Feeling Jack's mouth on him everywhere was giving him goosebumps. And also getting the reaction Jack wanted. Jack's mouth hovered over the bulge at the front of Ennis' pants, a grin on his face.

"So?" Jack asked, his fingers lingering around Ennis' belt. "We got somethin' or what?"

"Would I have stayed in that bathroom stall if we didn't?" Ennis asked, knowing it wasn't a straight answer to Jack's question, but it was the only one he knew how to give. If he wasn't careful about this...

Jack didn't seem to notice that Ennis hadn't really answered the question. He rose up, straddling Ennis' knees. "I've got other things in mind besides what happened in that bathroom," he said. His imagination had run wild ever since Ennis came to him last night.

He would let Ennis take the reins with where this relationship was going. He didn't want to overstep his bounds and scare Ennis off. This was new to them both, but Jack was a little better with accepting and trying to gain what he really wanted. He was comfortable with how much he wanted Ennis. The ranch hand however...Ennis was always thinking about the public and what would happen if someone caught them.

For Ennis, Jack would make sure this was their secret. After all, it was nobody's business but theirs.

Ennis tried laying there patiently as Jack worked on unstrapping his belt, but it was hard. He squirmed a bit then sat up. Jack looked at him and didn't say anything as Ennis got both of their jeans unfastened. He pushed Jack off of him then covered his body with his own, their faces only inches apart. Jack looked up at him, lust-filled hunger in his blue eyes. Jack's hands roamed Ennis' chest as Ennis shoved his jeans down and kicked them off. A small gasp slipped out of his mouth when Jack wrapped his hand around Ennis' aching cock.

"C'mere, cowboy," Jack said, placing his other hand on the back of Ennis' neck and pulled him down for another kiss as he continued to stroke Ennis. Thrusting into Jack's hand, Ennis reached down and tried to get Jack's jeans off of him. He was aching with desperate need and Jack was dragging it out with his slow strokes.

Ennis broke the kiss, hovering over Jack. "I'll turn you over if I have to," he said, surprised by his own forceful tone. Jack had stopped stroking his cock, but hadn't removed his hand. He just smirked at Ennis' words.

"Then take over," Jack said, moving both hands away from Ennis, that grin still on his face.

"Jack fuckin' Twist..." Ennis mumbled then rose up, pulling Jack up with him. He flipped Jack around so he was on his hands and knees in front of Ennis. His jeans were roughly pulled down, exposing his fine ass that Ennis had caught himself admiring a time or two. It looked even better bare.

Ennis spit in his hand and lubed up his cock then moved closer to Jack, positioning the head of his cock at Jack's entrance. "Ready, rodeo cowboy?"

Jack nodded his head as Ennis pushed forward. Part of him wanted to stop at the pained groan that came out of Jack, but Jack whispered for him to keep going. Slowly, Ennis pushed forward and was fully inside Jack. He paused for them both to adjust to this new thing then Ennis grabbed Jack's hips and started moving, thrusting in and out of Jack.

"Fuck," Jack groaned, moving back against Ennis and taking him deeper. It was painful but he was grateful that didn't last long. He could enjoy Ennis just the way he wanted to. He reached behind him, placing his hand on Ennis' as he felt Ennis' forehead against his back, his breath hot against his sweaty back.

Ennis was gripping Jack's hips hard as he fucked him. Jack didn't seem to complain. He either liked it rough, or he was just willing to take whatever Ennis gave him. Ennis had a stray thought in his mind that the harder he fucked, the longer he could maintain his manhood.

But he didn't want to hurt Jack.

Jack breathed out a moan as Ennis placed a kiss on his back between his shoulder blades. He took Ennis' hand and pulled him closer so there bodies were more intimately locked. He guided Ennis' hand around to his already leaking cock. Ennis wraped his fingers around it and Jack guided his movements. It didn't take long for Ennis to start stroking in time with his thrusts.

Biting his tongue to keep from crying out, Jack thrusted back against Ennis as he came, covering Ennis' hand and the bed. Ennis came inside Jack with a deep groan. Then they both collapsed heavily on the bed. 


	14. Torn

Ennis woke up the next morning to Jack waltzing into the room with a, "Good mornin', Sleepin' Beauty!" Ennis wanted to protest since he had had a long day yesterday, but knew he would have to get up in order to get to Euless then back to Wyoming in good time so Alma wouldn't bitch at him. Even so, he remained lying in bed. He couldn't go back to sleep, though, so not getting up right then was fine.

Jack walked over to his bag resting on the table and searched through it, pulling out some cash and stuffing it into his jacket pocket before he zipped up the bag. "What time is it?" Ennis asked, his eyes on Jack's back.

"A little after six," Jack said, looking over his shoulder at Ennis, a slight grin on his face. "I made a call earlier and I've got enough time to sign up for the rodeo tonight." He grabbed the bag and set it on the bed. "You're comin', right?"

Ennis rolled over onto his back. "I can't stay another-"

"Right," Jack said with a nod of his head. "You gotta get back to that damn wife o' yours that don't even want ya." He stared down at his bag for a moment as if deep in thought then looked over at Ennis. "You don't wanna stay?"

Ennis laid there for a moment then sat up. "Jack..."

"I ain't pushin' you," Jack said, stepping over to stand by the bed. "If you wanna go ahead and go, that's fine by me. Hell, you don't even have to go all the way to Euless. I'm sure I can hitch a ride somewhere-"

"I don't wanna go back home," Ennis said, his voice barely audible. It was silent enough in the room for Jack to hear every word. He could tell that his words took Jack by surprise. They took him by surprise also. He could admit it in his head all he wanted. It meant more the second it came out of his mouth, though. And he wouldn't be able to take it back because he MEANT it.

"Is it home," Jack asked. "or just Alma?"

Ennis scratched the back of his neck and looked at Jack. "Everything but the girls," he said. He was usually not this open around anyone. Growing up the way he had, he had closed himself up, keeping anyone from getting inside. But with Jack...things felt more comfortable as if opening up to Jack was the way to keep things going. He couldn't be FULLY open, but Jack was starting to get more from him than Alma did. "But, it's too late."

"You're gonna stick it out with Alma just because of the girls?"

Ennis shrugged his shoulders. "Thought I would till that talk with Alma," he said. "When I get back...I think that'll be the end of it."

"Ain't that a good thing?"

"I don't know."

Jack sat down on the bed with Ennis, who ignored the way Jack's eyes glanced over his bare chest absentmindedly. "Stay in Texas a while," he suggested. "Get ahold of Alma and tell 'er you need some space."

"Make her think it's just time to think the fate of our marriage over?"

"I didn't say that."

Ennis slid out from under the covers and rolled off the other side of the bed, getting to his feet. "Not in those words," he said then grabbed his jeans off the floor and pulled them on. Jack walked over to him as he fastened his belt. "Jack-"

"If you don't wanna listen, fine," Jack cut him off. His tone held no anger, but he was still upset. "But this is your happiness on the line. You ain't gettin' that happiness in that marriage of yours. She can-"

"It ain't her fault."

"Why the hell are you defendin' her?"

"She's still my wife."

"That you don't love."

Ennis looked at Jack then stepped around him, gathering up the rest of his clothes. He pulled on his boots then slipped his undershirt on over his head. He stuffed his other shirt into his bag and pulled out a clean one, buttoning it up before tucking it in. He turned and stopped when Jack stood there, holding his jacket out to him. Ennis took it from him but didn't put it on.

"I tried not to make this trip about Alma," Jack said in an apologetic tone. "I won't bring her up again. What you do when you get home ain't none of my business." He slipped his hands into his pockets. "I just want you to be happy."

Ennis stood there silent for a moment then slipped his jacket on. "I guess I can wait until morning to leave," he said, which got a wide grin out of Jack. He couldn't help but return the smile. Everything about Jack was too damn irresistable.

"You won't regret it, I promise," Jack said. "I can even set up a place for us more private than any dang motel." He probably didn't realize just how incredibly thoughtful that was. Ennis had already been worried enough when they booked this room last night.

They grabbed their bags and left the room, checking out before they headed out of the hotel, got into the truck, and headed down the road on the final leg of their journey to Euless, Texas.

They arrived a little after noon, but didn't have time to rest. Jack got them a place to stay before he headed off to get things ready for tonight. Ennis was left at the small apartment all day by himself. He didn't mind since he was used to being on his own. He was able to get a nap without anyone or anything bothering him.

Jack came back later that evening and then they were off to the rodeo. Ennis found himself a place in the stands while Jack headed off to do his thing. He sat down, not really liking the press of the crowd around him, but he would just have to toughen through for Jack's sake. He'd be back in that little apartment before he knew it.

Ennis had participated in rodeoes, but hadn't in a while due to the fact that he had a family now. Watching it brought back old memories, but nothing that would make him miss it. And seeing Jack get tossed by a bull just made him think he didn't want to get anywhere near another rodeo. Of course, if he stuck around for a while as Jack wanted, he would be attending these things quite regularly.

If he stayed.

He still didn't know what to think about Jack's offer of staying longer than he had planned. Ennis hadn't gotten in contact with Alma yet. If she didn't hear from him soon, she would probably just pack up the girls and leave with no thought about him. That would be the end of their marriage without Ennis having to take any of the responsibility.

But, wasn't it his job? They were his family, after all. Not even Jack could pull him away from that fact.

He'd have to tell Jack tonight that he couldn't stick around.

They went out for drinks later. Jack was sweaty and sore, but that didn't keep him from going out and mingling with the other rodeo cowboys that he had made friends with since they arrived here. Ennis tried not to get caught up in that, but Jack still introduced him to a few people. Ennis felt mighty out of place and always felt someone staring at him as if they knew about him and Jack. Of course, whenever he looked, it just turned out to be a figment of his imagination. Most of everyone here were friends.

Ennis was finally glad when they got back to the apartment sometime after midnight. He wanted to talk to Jack about him staying, but Jack was drunk and passed out on the couch not too long after walking through the door. Ennis draped a blanket over him with a sigh before he headed off to bed. 


	15. Goodbye

Jack woke up the next morning with a throbbing headache. He turned his nose up, telling himself to take a shower as soon as he stood up. He glanced around, noticing that he was laying on the couch. He couldn't remember much of what happened last night, but he had apparently passed out on the couch. He pushed the blanket off of him as he slowly sat up, rubbing the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes with a pained groan, "Damn."

"Hey," Ennis was standing by the couch, holding out a cup of coffee. Jack lowered his hand and took the coffee, thanking Ennis. "Long day, huh?"

"Worth it, though," Jack said then took a drink of the coffee. It was weaker than he was used to, but it helped his hangover some. He leaned back on the couch. "What time is it?"

"Quarter till noon," Ennis said, stepping away from the couch. It was only then that he noticed Ennis' bags near the door.

Jack studied the bags for a moment, wondering if he had judged things wrong. Or had he just heard Ennis wrong? "Thought you were staying for a while longer," he said, looking over at Ennis.

Ennis looked over at his bags then reluctantly turned to Jack. "I said I'd stay last night," he said. "You wanted me at the rodeo. I agreed to that, but never said-"

"That was included in the deal."

"Jack-"

"Ennis," Jack set his coffee down on the table and got to his feet. He didn't say anything for a moment until the room stopped spinning. "You told me you didn't want to go home. That wasn't just my imagination. You admitted to that."

"My family's my responsibility."

"It ain't supposed to be a burden."

Ennis fell silent and Jack could tell how much was going through Ennis' mind. He was torn between Jack and his girls. Dragging him all the way to Texas was unfair, even though it had been Ennis' suggestion. Jack shouldn't have even suggested he stay down here a while longer. He wanted to explore this 'thing' with Ennis further, but was it worth it? If Jack continued to push for more time, that would push Ennis away. And ever since they had known each other, Jack valued this friendship. If he only got that, it should be enough, but Jack wanted Ennis in more ways than he could say.

"You call Alma?" Jack asked, breaking the silence. He knew what was going to happen here, but he would just have to man up and deal with it. Ennis had a life. A life he was committed to.

Ennis nodded his head. "Told her I'd be headin' back pretty soon," he said. He looked just as bummed as Jack felt about this happening. Was either of them strong enough or brave enough to say goodbye? "She'll be expectin' me back by tomorrow evenin'."

"And if you don't get there?"

"I'll get there."

Jack hesitated a moment, not wanting this to bother him as much as it was. He couldn't say goodbye, no matter what. He was already a bit heartbroken and Ennis was still standing there. "Well...I guess you better go then," he said.

"Yeah," Ennis said with a slight nod of his head. His tongue flicked across his lips as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he turned slightly toward the bags waiting for him. "See ya around?" He looked at Jack.

Jack wanted it to be so, but didn't think the probability of that was very high. But, he nodded his head anyway. "Have a safe trip back," he said. His heart started to pound against his chest, knowing what he would be going through the moment Ennis turned away and walked out that door. They hadn't had a lot of time together since they got here and Jack wished he had done things differently.

Ennis stood there for a moment longer then turned and headed for the door. He bent over and grabbed his bags then just stood there, his hand on the doorknob. Jack turned back for the couch.

Then, the next thing he knew, Ennis was turning him and they both fell backward onto the couch. Their lips came together, both clinging to each other as if their lives depended on it. Jack tried to shift into a more comfortable position on the couch, but Ennis wouldn't let up. Well, there really wasn't an uncomfortable position when Ennis had him like this.

Jack broke the kiss after a moment, both breathing heavily. "Thought you had to go," he said, not wanting to ignore the feeling of Ennis' erection pressing against him. He hated jeans right now.

"I'll still make it back."

"Depends on how long-"

"I'll drive fast," Ennis said then rose up. One leg was between Jack's legs, pressing against his crotch. Jack sat up slightly, starting to unbutton Ennis' shirt while Ennis pushed his jacket off.

Jack untucked Ennis' shirt then started on his belt. After this, he knew he would be even more reluctant about letting Ennis go, but he ignored that for now. If he could help it, this wasn't going to be the last time they saw each other. He looked up at Ennis as he fondled Ennis through his jeans.

Ennis pushed him back against the couch, angling his head back and kissing him. Jack grabbed Ennis' undershirt with one hand while his other slipped inside Ennis' jeans and clutched that rockhard leaking member. When Ennis groaned, Jack thrusted his hips, humping Ennis' leg.

Ennis grabbed Jack's shirt tightly and they shifted position to where Jack was nearly bent over the arm of the couch completely. Ennis reached around and unfastened Jack's jeans, lingering for a moment on the bulge. Jack smirke slightly then pulled off his shirt as Ennis tugged his jeans down over his ass. Jack had dreamed about a lot of sex during this trip and hated the fact that this might be their last fuck. At least for a while.

Because Jack would do all he could to get back to Wyoming sooner or later.

"Fuck," Jack let out a long groan as Ennis penetrated him. Ennis moved a bit slower until he was fully sheathed inside Jack's tight ass. Jack closed his eyes, feeling Ennis' hands on his back and shoulders.

Then Ennis started to move. He thrust in and out of Jack slow at first until hunger won over and Jack was begging to be FUCKED. Ennis obliged and the couch creaked and groaned with every movement until something snapped. They toppled onto the floor as one side of the couch broke and nearly came apart completely. Despite the fall, Ennnis had managed to remain deep inside Jack.

Jack looked over his shoulder at Ennis. "That's comin' out of your pocket," he said.

Ennis smirked at him then pinned him to the floor and fucked him. Jack reached back, clutching Ennis' shirt as he tightened around Ennis' cock and came all over the floor. Ennis continued to fuck him until he finished off a moment later. They both laid there panting on the floor until Ennis pulled out.

"I'll keep in touch," Jack said, rolling over. He watched as Ennis got up and fixed himself. He grinned. "I could always go with ya."

"Then comin' down here would be pointless," Ennis said. Jack admired his ass as he bent over and grabbed his jacket. "Alma's already pissed enough."

"Fuck her raw for me."

"Jack..."

Jack got to his feet, stumbling a bit as he yanked his jeans up. "She's a fool for leavin' you," he said. "I wouldn't."

Ennis didn't say anything to that. "I gotta go."

"See ya."

Ennis left. 


	16. Endings

Ennis made good time back to Riverton, though he had stopped for a few minutes every couple of hours to convince himself not to turn around and head back to Jack. He was a bit surprised Jack hadn't tried harder to get him to stay. Part of him had wanted that to happen. Now he was stuck with the guilt of walking out on Jack even though Jack hadn't been too sad to see him go. He was more confident than Ennis was about them seeing each other again sometime. Well, Jack HAD promised he'd stay in touch.

He parked at the house and got out. He had made it back earlier than expected, even with all the stops. He looked around as he grabbed his bag out of the back of the truck, wondering what it would be like to take off for real. The only life he had here were the girls. He'd have to let them go one day, anyway. No matter what, he would always remain their father.

Unless he and Jack were found out. Then he'd end up a dead father.

He headed up the stairs and walked in through the front door, pausing when he saw Monroe standing in the kitchen with Alma. Both of them turned when he walked in and Alma looked surprised to see him.

"Hey, Monroe," Ennis said, suppressing the urge to demand what the hell he was doing here. Alma might have already said things were over between them, but she was still his wife and-

He abruptly clamped down on that thought since he had practically run off with Jack.

"Hey, Ennis," Monroe said. He looked at Alma. "I better get back to the store." He had obviously been helping with supper. He set down a bowl of something then left, Ennis stepping out of his way in the process.

Ennis watched him go then looked back at Alma. "Where are the girls?"

"At a neighbor's," Alma said, turning back to the stove. "They're stayin' there for the night."

"Oh," Ennis said then looked down at the bag in his hand. He was debating whether or not he needed to unpack. He set it down on the floor out of the way. He stepped forward, looking back at her. "Alma-"

"How'd things go with Jack?" Alma asked. "He get settled down all right?"

Ennis knew better than to think she actually cared. Unless Jack was offering to pay them back, she didn't give a rat's ass about anything. "Yeah, he got settled in good," he said, remembering the broken couch. "Got settled REAL good." He looked at her at the sound of a clatter. She had dropped a spoon. It had bounced off the stove and hit the floor. "Alma?"

Alma bent down and grabbed the spoon, pratically throwing it into the sink. "Ennis," she started, turning to him. She started to say something then stopped and crossed her arms. "Monroe's been helpin' out since you've been gone."

"With?"

"He knows a good divorce lawyer."

"Alma-"

"You knew this was comin' when you left," Alma said. "I'm not goin' on like this anymore."

"Like what?" Ennis asked. "Other than the arguing-"

"Which we do quite often," Alma said. "And don't you dare tell me you wanna try to make us work out." She shook her head sharply, her hair falling over her shoulders. "Because then you wouldn't have run off with Jack."

"What're you talkin' about?"

"I didn't send the girls away because we'd be arguing about the divorce," Alma said, uncrossing her arms and flipping off the stove. "The divorce is probably the only thing we'd agree on." She stood like that for a moment then looked back at him. "Somethin's not right here and it sure as hell ain't my fault."

"You wanted to get married-"

"You think it'd be any different if we had waited?" Alma asked. "You'd have met Jack up there workin' for Aguirre and you'd get married knowin' that."

"Knowin' what?" Ennis asked. The sinking feeling in his gut told him that he knew exactly what she was talking about. Something that she had been keeping from him. In light of their divorce, she decided to open up?

"Jack Twist?" Alma said his name in near disgust. She shook her head. "I KNOW you didn't go down there to Texas to be a good 'friend.' "

"You don't know-"

Alma had tears in her eyes. From anger or something else, he didn't know. "I know good and well," she said. "I knew you got up that night. I saw you. I didn't want to believe it until you lied to me."

Ennis didn't really know what she was talking about, but the longer he thought about it, the more things made sense. That night he had gotten up with an aching in his chest that had been temporarily fixed by Jack. That kiss...

"Get out of my house," Alma said, pointing toward the door. "I don't care where you park your ass tonight, but it ain't here." She lowered her hand, not even trying to prevent the tears from falling. "I want nothin' to do with you. And if you weren't a good father, I'd make sure the girls never saw you again."

After everything that had been said, he couldn't find relief in the fact that he was being freed from this marriage and still be able to see his girls. All he felt was anger and he didn't even think about the fact that she had pretty much implied she wouldn't bring his affair with Jack out in the open. He should be grateful for that. She still wanted the girls to grow up knowing their father.

Ennis took a step back and grabbed his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. "I'll be at the hotel," he said, though he knew she wouldn't be getting in contact with him anywhere. She would only call to get through the divorce as planned. He turned and left, knowing that there was nothing more to be said here. She had said enough and his plans should be making plans to get out of this town. But, he couldn't run away no matter how enticing that was.

He had only known Jack a month. This thing of theirs hadn't even been going on for barely a week. He couldn't just take off back down to Texas immediately. He wasn't even sure how he felt about Jack. The only thing he knew was that he wanted to keep going, but didn't know how to express that. He had made a giant leap when he had given Jack a ride to Texas. Would he be able to make a similar leap after the divorce was final?

He'd just have to wait and find out. 


	17. Ache

It had been a little over a week since Ennis had left. Jack had had an envelope ready to mail since the day Ennis left. He just never got the time to mail it. Or maybe he just didn't have the courage to. He was always coming up with excuses not to mail the letter. He missed Ennis terribly. Why couldn't he just have the balls to mail it the first day? Ennis would have gotten there before the letter did anyway. But, would Ennis have felt uncomfortable if he had gotten home and a letter from Jack so quickly?

Maybe it WAS better to wait.

Jack headed to the post office a few minutes after opening time. He was glad he still remembered Ennis' address. He mailed the letter, feeling a giant burden lift from his shoulders. He headed back to his place, feeling a lot better.

Other than the fact that he hated every single passing moment without Ennis. He was smart enough not to show that since a lot of women from the rodeo had been hitting on him. Especially one woman in particular.

Lureen Newsome. Who was engaged to someone else, but that didn't stop her from flirting and getting a dance from Jack. He couldn't deny that he was attracted to her since she was beautiful and smart and funny, but she wasn't anywhere close to the attraction Jack felt for Ennis Del Mar. He had the feeling he was going to see Lureen again tonight.

And he did.

Jack hadn't been sitting at the bar too long before she walked over. He had had his eye on a man that was similar in build to Ennis, but she didn't notice. Jack's eyes didn't linger on the man long enough for any straying thoughts, of course.

"Thought you said you weren't comin' tonight," Lureen said, sitting down at the bar with him. He waved at the bartendar, getting her a drink. "What changed your mind?"

Jack looked at her, wondering what it would be like to fuck her. The only way she was similar to Ennis was that she had someone else. Like Ennis, she was something he couldn't have without an affair. Knowing that, if he had sex with her, would it ease the pain in his chest? He didn't think so since he only wanted Ennis, but hell, he was a man. A man with needs. If he needed something, he couldn't wait. Ennis probably could, but Jack wasn't like him.

"I'm definitely on my way to Hell," Jack said, picking up his beer. He gave a crooked smile and looked back at her, noticing the smirk on her face. "Wantin' to see you again is mighty sinful." He knew he was only saying what she wanted to hear, but he didn't give a fuck. He had gone a week without sex. Jerking off while thinking of Ennis just wasn't enough. He needed something there.

Lureen had seemed real happy when she talked about her boyfriend, but she didn't mind sleeping around. She smiled at him, her wide brown eyes sparkling. Damn. Her eyes were brown like Ennis'. He needed to make sure Ennis' name didn't fall from his lips while he was with her. Looking into her eyes would make that difficult. Hopefully her body would distract him.

He was already thinking about sex and that hadn't even been mentioned yet! Why was he so confident that it would?

Because he knew women. And all of them always seemed to have a hard time refusing him.

"Wanna get outta here?" Lureen asked, winking at him as she got to her feet. She didn't even touch her beer.

Jack looked down at his half empty glass. He dropped some money on the counter then stood up and followed after Lureen. She didn't wait before they got in her car. She grabbed him and pushed him onto the hood of the car, climbing on top of him. It was dark enough in this spot of the parking lot so no one would be able to see them. And even if they could, Lureen didn't seem like she gave a fuck.

Kissing her was different from kissing Ennis. He was grateful for that since that would help him separate himself from the feelings Ennis gave him. Kissing Lureen, there was nothing there. If it was mutual, she didn't say anything.

Lureen reached between them and started unfastening his belt. She was definitely in a hurry. Her hand slipped into his jeans and grabbed his cock, stroking him to an erection. He thrusted into her hand, closing his eyes and remembering the way it felt to have Ennis' hand there. His hand came up and squeezed her breast to remind himself of who he was with right now. Her hand left his cock and she hurriedly unbuttoned her blouse and yanked down her bra before placing Jack's hand back to where it had been. He kneaded her tit then ducked his head down and nipped at the hard, perky nipple. She moaned, her fingers tangled in his hair.

He moved his hands down to unfasten her tight jeans, rubbing her through the fabric before he pushed them down, grabbing her ass as he slid off the hood of the car. She pushed them down more, spreading her legs as much as she could without ridding herself of her pants. She turned her back to him and bent over, exposing herself to him. Jack looked around to make sure no one was watching then in one quick movement, he was inside her.

He had her cumming real fast.

But all he could think about was Ennis. 


	18. Free

Alma didn't call him at the hotel. She just left a message with the receptionist at the hotel to tell him. It had been a few days since she had kicked Ennis out and she knew she was getting everything together and ready without him. The least she could see of him the better. He didn't mind that. Other than the fact that he hadn't seen his girls since before he left with Jack. He could have always said something about it, but he was on Alma's bad side enough. Though being a father to those two was something that Alma was letting him keep.

Ennis checked out of the hotel, knowing he'd have to find someplace else to stay. He headed to the house after getting Alma's message. He was annoyed to find Monroe there along with the lawyer. Ennis sat down on the couch in the living room while Alma and Monroe got coffee. Ennis felt like he needed a beer. Not only was he getting a divorce, but he was pretty sure a relationship between Alma and Monroe was being rubbed in his face. He wasn't jealous. Honestly, he felt as if Monroe was better for her than he was. And not just because of his thing with Jack.

Thing...Why did he always have to call it that?

Alma and Monroe returned with the coffee, setting the tray on the coffee table. They started small talk with the lawyer and they were all practically a happy family. Ennis shifted in his seat, feeling out of place. He wanted this over with as soon as possible, but Alma wasn't going to have that. She would make him suffer and then free him from this. He knew he should say something to get this moving, but he didn't. He just sat back and listened to them. Alma was definite going to get the lawyer more on her side in this. It didn't matter. As long as he was able to see his girls, she could have whatever she wanted out of this marriage.

"Ennis, can you go get some spoons?" Alma asked, pretending to be sweet and friendly. "I forgot 'em."

Ennis didn't say that she could go right back and get them herself. This gave him some time alone. He stood up and stepped into the kitchen, opening one of the drawers. He paused when he saw the mail on the counter. It didn't look like it had gone through yet. He knew that because he saw Jack's name on one of the envelopes. He grabbed it and slipped it into his pocket then grabbed the spoons, closed the drawer, and went back into the living room. He set the spoons on the tray as he walked around and sat back down on the couch next to Alma.

Things got down to business and that lasted for quite a while. Papers were signed and a court date was assigned for tomorrow and everything would be finished up there. Alma had decided not to take his money, thank god. He was allowed to take care of the girls on weekends. Not fair to him, but he wasn't going to fuss about it and make it worse. He would be cooperative. He'd go to court tomorrow and all of this would finally be over.

Monroe left with the lawyer and Alma saw them out. Ennis headed into the bedroom to pack more of his things. If he had to, he'd pack up everything he owned and live in his truck. Which was more inviting than a motel room. It wouldn't cost him anything. And Alma wouldn't let him stay here even if he did sleep on the couch. Once he was gone she'd probably burn the couch after seeing what she had that one night.

He had his mind on Jack as he packed. Which made him think about that letter. He would have to wait to read it since he really didn't want Alma anywhere nearby when he did. She was practically giving him an opening to go back to Texas, but he wasn't too sure if that was really what he wanted to do. Could he really drop everything and just go because he wanted to be with Jack?

"Do you need help packin'?" Alma asked, walking into the bedroom.

"I can handle it," Ennis said, keeping his back to her as he packed.

"You gonna run after Jack?"

Ennis stuffed the shirt into the bag then turned to her. "It ain't like that, Alma," he said. He couldn't talk to her about this. It was inappropriate and he just didn't want to. "Are you gonna be runnin' after Monroe?"

Alma didn't even try to deny anything. "He was here last night," she said.

"You slept with him?"

"Ain't none of your business."

"Until tomorrow, we're still married," Ennis said, wondering why he was getting so upset about this. "Monroe bein' here last night IS my business."

"But your business is kept secret?"

Ennis clenched his hand into a fist. "I'm not goin' to Texas," he said. "I've still gotta job here."

"If you keep skippin' work days-"

"The warden owes me and he knows it," Ennis said since he had worked his ass off any day of the year for that warden. He thought about what Jack had once said. That maybe he'd be happier if he just quit the job. Could he be able to do that? After all, it was the only thing holding him here besides the girls.

He told himself not to think about that right now.

"If he knew you were skippin' work because of Jack-"

"Maybe I should just quit."

Alma stopped and looked at him. "You still have to provide for those girls, Ennis," she said.

"It ain't worth-" Ennis stopped when she turned and left the room. He shook his head then finished packing and left the room, grabbing the bag he had brought from the hotel. He'd have to get his clothes washed sometime.

Alma was waking the girls up as he walked by and left, not even going to say goodbye to the girls. He didn't want to deal with Alma anymore. He headed down the stairs and over to his truck, throwing the bags in the back. He backed out and drove away, heading back to the hotel to stay there until he decided otherwise. He got a room then locked himself in the room and sat on the bed.

He took the envelope out of his pocket then took off his jacket, turning the lamp on. He stood up and walked over to the window, pulling the window closed before he walked back over to the bed and sat down. He opened the envelope and pulled out the letter.

It read: "Ennis, Hope you got back home safely and that Alma didn't give you too much trouble. Things are going good here in Texas. You should've stayed a bit longer. I bet you'd have liked it here. I love it. Hope to hear from you soon. If I don't, I'll do my best to make plans and head on up there to Wyoming. I don't want to put any pressure on you. Your Bud, Jack."

Ennis just sat there for a long time just staring at the letter. For some reason, it felt like his most prized possession. Maybe that was just because Alma had taken most of everything else he owned. He'd have to keep an eye on the mail. There was no way in hell he was going to let her just throw away anything from Jack that might come in.

"You should just pack up and get your ass down there then so you don't hafta worry about it," Ennis mumbled to himself, folding the letter and slipping it back into the envelope. He studied the envelope for a moment then got up to write his own letter.

The next day, Ennis dropped off the letter at the Post Office first thing. He met Alma at the courthouse and everything was over and done with some time later. Ennis got back to the hotel exhausted, but free. 


	19. Wavering

Jack woke up in Lureen's bed. He had been with her every night for the last three nights. She kept asking him over because she wanted sex and her fiance was traditional and would only wait until after they were married. Spoke highly of the man, but Jack didn't mind Lureen coming to him for something her boyfriend couldn't give her. She was still going to get married and Jack would eventually become a spot in her past that she would fondly remember.

Lureen walked into the room, closing and locking the door behind her since she still lived with her parents. The house was big enough for Jack to go unnoticed, but it would only take one little thing to get him and Lureen in big trouble. Jack hadn't met her parents(and wouldn't), but from what she had told him about them, he wanted to steer clear of them for life. He felt sorry for Lureen and the guy that would be marrying into this family. He wouldn't say that out loud, of course. Not everyone shared his opinion on things.

"I went by and picked up your mail for ya," Lureen said, sitting cross-legged on the bed beside him. She dropped his mail onto his chest then looked through what she had gotten. "Just figured since I was there and all."

"Thanks," Jack said, sitting up and looking through the mail. It was mostly junk, but one letter in particular caught his attention. A smile appeared on his face when he saw the letter from Ennis.

"Obviously you got somethin' good," Lureen said, noticing the smile. She smiled. "You got someone special?"

"Sort of," Jack said since he didn't really know where his relationship with Ennis lied. Could he even call it a relationship? Ennis had always called it a thing. "Good friend up in Wyoming."

"Haven't heard from him in a while?" Lureen asked. "Or is it a she?"

"He," Jack said, lowering the letter and looking at her. "And it's only been like a week and a half since I seen him last. But we're close."

"Like brothers?"

"I guess you could say that."

"That's nice," Lureen said. "I sometimes wish I had a friendship like that." She leaned over, putting her mail on the night stand. "I don't have a lot of friends and the ones I do get don't usually stick around long." She straightened up and looked at him. "I've also got somethin' to tell you."

Jack lowered his mail and looked at her. "Shoot."

"My wedding's tomorrow," Lureen said. She sounded both excited and sad. She wanted to get married, but she clearly had had a good time with Jack. He couldn't argue that since he felt the same way. There wasn't any love between them. It was just fun. "So, unless you wanna do something tonight..."

"Last night was the last time."

"Unless you wanna get together sometime again."

"We'll see how things go after you're married."

Lureen nodded then crawled across the bed and over to him, kissing him. He placed his hand on her cheek, kissing her back, slowly running his fingers through her hair. She pulled back and smiled at him. "You're one irresistable bastard," she said. "Too bad I ain't marryin' you."

"Yeah, too bad," Jack said, but only half meant it. She might be a good choice for a good wife, but he didn't think a marriage between them would go anywhere. He'd probably end up working for her dad. That would be unappealing. "Think it's time I got outta here?"

Lureen ran a hand down his bare chest. "You can always wait a few minutes," she said then bit her bottom lip and slowly started to pull the cover off of him.

He placed his hand on hers, stopping her. "If I don't leave now, you ain't never gettin' married," he said which got a grin out of her. She kissed him again then stood up and left the room to keep her parents occupied while he left. He got dressed and headed out of the house as quietly as he could. He usually did his sneaking out earlier in the mornings, but he got out now perfectly fine. And since he had gotten a ride with Lureen, he had to walk back to his place.

Which frustrated him since he wanted to get home ASAP and read the letter Ennis had sent. As soon as he walked through the door of his apartment, he put the rest of the mail on the table then opened Ennis' letter as he walked over to the couch and sat down. Carefully since one side of it was still broken. He hadn't got around to fix it and he probably wouldn't since there was a nice memory behind it. Thankfully no one was invited over or else they would ask about it.

Jack pulled out the letter and read it. Ennis let him know he had a safe trip. Then he mentioned the divorce and that Alma had kicked him out pretty fast. He was living in his truck and a hotel and only got to see his girls on weekends. Jack's good mood was gone. He wished he was up there with Ennis to help him through all of this. He was obviously not having a good time. The least Alma could have done was give Ennis a place to stay until he found something better. The bitch.

Jack put the letter away, fighting the urge to jump up, pack, and head up to Wyoming right now. Ennis needed someone. Jack was the only one willing to do anything. The only good thing in Ennis' life right now was the fact that he was no longer married to Alma. Ennis probably tried to be nice about all of this and she probably did her best to make things miserable. What was her problem anyway?

He thought about writing another letter, but didn't know what he could say in it that would be supportive to Ennis without having him go up there. Jack was starting to get a life down here, but that wasn't as important to him as Ennis. Unlike Ennis, he was willing to drop everything he had here and go. Which made Ennis the more responsible one, but Jack wanted this "thing" to work out between them. But, he had to be careful and think about Ennis, who was worried that they'd get found out.

In some way, some how, Jack needed to get Ennis out of there.

* * *

Ennis headed to work after getting a trailer set up a ways out of town. He liked the quiet, and here he wouldn't have to worry about talking a walk with the risk he might run into anyone he knew. Who were all probably on Alma's side about the divorce. It shouldn't have been anyone's business, but he couldn't control people's curiosity. And after about a month after the divorce, people stopped talking.

He stopped by the Post Office on his way to work, but hadn't gotten anything from Jack in a while. He could always send another letter, but never got around to it. Jack said he'd keep in touch, so he'd keep in touch.

At work, Ennis' mind was constantly thinking about Jack. And his new freedom. He loved spending time with the girls when he could, but mostly all he wanted to do was head back down to Texas. But, just because he wanted it didn't mean he had the courage to go through with it. All he could do was think about all the times he had spent with Jack and treasure the letters that were sent. Though Ennis had only received that first one and that was a month ago.

As the day went on, Jack didn't leave his mind. The warden asked to see Ennis when Ennis found himself slacking off a bit with work. At the end of the day, he was let go. Because Ennis had decided to quit. If he was still married, Alma would certainly bitch at him. And she probably would still. He could always get some work around town. If not, Alma had already decided that whatever Ennis wouldn't be able to bring in, she'd call her parents. She could always make Ennis provide the money, but the less she had to do with him the better. At least he didn't have to worry about his girls. Other than the fact that he felt pretty bad for not being able to provide any more money for them at the moment.

Ennis kept an eye out for anything from Jack. He had sent a letter, letting Jack know that he had quit his job. He was still expecting a letter back from Jack saying that he was either coming up to Wyoming or that Ennis should head down to Texas. But, after a month and a half of nothing, Ennis just got an update on Jack's life. Not too personal which meant that he had done it in a hurry. Ennis hadn't thought things down in Texas were THAT busy.

He went around town, looking for work, stopping at a bar one night to take a break. He had a few drinks, wondering if he should write to Jack again. He glanced around the bar idly, pausing when he saw Alma dancing with Monroe. He paid for his drinks then left the bar pretty quickly. They were divorced, but he still didn't like to see Alma out having a good time with Monroe. He'd expect her to pretend if she knew he was there, but he just had to accept the fact that Alma was better off and he should be glad that she was finally happy. With the way he was, he didn't think he could make anyone happy.

Except Jack.

Ennis headed back to his trailer, bummed out and a little bit drunk. It had been about two months since he had last saw Jack. Out of all that time, he had only received two letters. Ennis should be pissed, but Jack had a life, too. A life that he had wanted to share with Ennis, but Ennis had left him down in Texas because of his life here in Riverton. It wasn't fair to Jack and part of him wished he could just take it back.

He parked the truck and got out. It was dark, but he still noticed the car parked in front of his trailer. He slowed his pace for a moment, wondering what the hell was going on.

Then he noticed who was sitting on the steps of his trailer.


	20. Welcome Reunion

Jack got to his feet, that smile on his face brightening Ennis' dour mood. Ennis walked over to him and hugged him, not having to worry about prying eyes. Jack's arms went around Ennis, returning the embrace, which lingered, but neither of them cared. Ennis hadn't realized how much he had missed Jack. He already knew it was a lot, but having him here now just reminded him of the way he had felt without him.

Ennis stepped back after a moment, barely hearing from Jack for two months was completely forgotten. "What the hell are you doin' here?" he asked. "You're supposed to be havin' a life in Texas."

"I do have a life, but not much of one," Jack said. He grinned, his blue eyes practically twinkling. "Turns out what I found in Texas turned around and headed right back up here to Wyoming."

Ennis thought he'd be prepared for Jack's show of affection, but even completely alone, it still took him off guard and he didn't know what to do about it. And he didn't think that was because they were two men. Before he and Alma had gotten married, he had been the same way. That had been the only time he had felt real affection for her. Marriage had ruined their relationship. "How long do you plan on stayin'?" he asked.

"How long ya want me?"

"Jack..."

"I got nothin' in Texas to hurry back to," Jack said, the smile on his face fading. "And since you're divorced and..." He gestured around. "...livin' in the middle of nowhere," He attempted another smile, a slight way of pleading not to get hurt. "I figured I could stay a while."

"Ain't nothin' goin' on here," Ennis said, though he really didn't want to discourage Jack. He wanted him to stay. And, hell, the girls might have fun when they stayed with him this weekend. They had warmed up to Jack quickly.

"Good thing I did some lookin' around before comin' over here, then," Jack said. "I thought maybe we could do some fishin' up on Brokeback Mountain. Kinda make up for the time we were supposed to work up there together but didn't."

Ennis couldn't really say no since he didn't have a job and was able to make plans for a trip. "The girls are comin' to stay with me this weekend," he said, knowing the girls wouldn't want to spend their time with Dad fishing on a mountain.

"No problem," Jack said. Always easy going. "We can go sometime next week." He knew how important the girls were to Ennis. He wouldn't make any plans to disrupt that. But, he wouldn't give up. He was definitely fighting for Ennis.

"Dammit."

Jack looked worried. "What?" he asked. "Somethin' I said?"

"No," Ennis said, not even sure how he could voice his emotions correctly. "You're just so...fine with everything no matter what."

"That a bad thing?"

"It just makes you so goddam irresistable."

"If I hd a dime for every time someone told me that..." Jack trailed off with a shake of his head. He nodded toward the trailer. "You gonna invite me in?"

Ennis was a bit hesitant. Since no one was around for miles, nothing was keeping them separated out here. But, he knew the second that they were inside...it would take a lot of effort on his part to hold back on desires that needed to be fulfilled the last two months. "Yeah," he said, walking past Jack, a bit flustered by his own thoughts. He unlocked the door and stepped inside turning on the light.

Jack walked in behind him, closing the door. He looked around. "Cozy," he said with a slight nod of his head. He looked at Ennis. "Better than livin' with Alma?"

"Anything's better than livin' with Alma," Ennis said, the words coming out before he could stop them. He blamed the beer. Being drunk around anybody wasn't a good idea. Even so, he got two beers out of the fridge, handing one to Jack.

"So," Jack said after a moment of silence. He stepped away from the door and sat down, making himself more at home. "How does the single life of Ennis Del Mar feel like?" He took a swig of his beer.

"Seein' as how I was only married for a short time," Ennis started.

"To a shitty wife," Jack put in.

Ennis pointed his bottle at Jack. "I wasn't gonna say that," he said, though deep down he knew it was true. He felt a bit guilty for thinking that way. "My life don't feel any different now than before I was married." He lifted the bottle to his mouth. "Except for the fact that you're in it." He took a drink.

"And you no longer have a job," Jack said as Ennis leaned against the sink/counter. "You're pretty much repeating your life before you were tied down in marriage."

"Pretty much," Ennis agreed with a nod of his head. "I'm tryin' to get a job. Still gotta support my kids."

"I can always send ya somethin'-"

"I'm fine, Jack," Ennis said, not really wanting to put that burden on Jack. He needed to supply his own needs or else he'd just sit around on his ass doing nothing.

"All righty, then," Jack said then took another drink. "Life down in Texas is just as excitin'."

"What about the rodeo?"

"The money's REAL good," Jack said with a smile. "Only thing I want to go back to."

"Find anyone special?"

"You don't wanna hear about that."

"It's either really bad-"

"I met her, slept with her for three days, then she got married," Jack said, getting to his feet. "You regret askin'?"

"I don't care about anything you have to say," Ennis said. "At least it's something."

Jack frowned, reminded that he hadn't kept in touch with Ennis as promised. "I really fucked up there, didn't I?" he asked. "Ennis, I'm real sorry-"

"You came all the way up here," Ennis said. "Apology accepted."

Jack smiled wide, making Ennis' heart pound. "I was gonna come up here a lot sooner," he said. "But, I didn't have my own car." He paused for a moment. "Still don't. I borrowed the car that's outside."

"Are they expectin' that car back anytime soon?"

From the expression on Jack's face, Ennis knew that he hadn't thought about that little detail when he made his plans to come up here. "Shit," he muttered. "Guess I can't stay as long as I want. And it'd never be long enough." He planted one hand on his hip then took another drink.

Ennis set his bottle down, pushing away from the sink. "You've had a long trip," he said. "You're probably tired." He looked around the small space which was his trailer. "I probably don't have enough room."

"You have a bed," Jack said, stepping over to the table that folded down into a bed. Ennis always left it as a bed since living alone, he didn't need the table. "That's really all the room I need." He sat down.

Seeing Jack on his bed...Ennis couldn't keep his befuddled mind focused. He regretted having those extra drinks. "Well, I guess that's good then," he said.

Jack stood up only long enough to set his beer down next to Ennis'. He looked at Ennis. "Wanna put this bed to good use?" he asked. "See if we can shake the trailer?"

Ennis felt his face burn up, knowing he was blushing. He cleared his throat, turning slightly away from Jack and scratching the back of his neck. He lowered his arm when he heard Jack get up and then Jack was pressed against his back. One arm came around, his hand moving up the front of Ennis' shirt. Ennis looked down as Jack fumbled with the buttons of his shirt onehanded.

Jack rested his forehead on Ennis' shoulder. "You really need to invest in some t-shirts," he said. "Or," His other came around around, embracing Ennis from behind. Neither of them moved for a long time and just stood like that. Ennis placed his hand on Jack's, his fingers still fiddling with the buttons. "Ennis..."

Ennis closed his eyes as Jack kissed along his neck up to his ear. He tilted his head slightly to the side, enjoying the intimacy. Bit different than both times they had just jumped into sex. Jack's hands moved down, untucking Ennis' shirt. Ennis leaned back against him, reaching up and unbuttoning his shirt while Jack nuzzled his neck. Ennis had never forgotten Jack's touch, but it seemed like so much more now.

Jack unfastened Ennis' jeans, gentling thrusting against Ennis' ass. Ennis grabbed Jack's wrist before Jack's hand could find his way down to what both of them wanted right now. Jack murmured in complaint but didn't pull out of Ennis' grip.

Ennis turned around, coming face to face with Jack just inches away. Jack's eyes met his own and their lips came together. After a moment, Ennis grabbed Jack's jacket then pushed Jack up against the wall, pressing his body closer to the other. Jack pushed Ennis' jacket off along with his shirt, clinging desperately to the undershirt as their kiss became more heated. They had both been desperate for the other's touch the last two months.

Ennis broke the kiss and pulled his shirt off, dropping it to the floor and feeling Jack's hands all over him. He didn't say anything when Jack pushed him onto the bed, crawling in on top of him. They kissed once again while they both rid each other of clothing. Ennis trembled in anticipation as he felt Jack's cock brush against his own once they were both naked. Jack slowly continued to grind against Ennis' body, making Ennis want him even more.

"Jack," Ennis pleaded, thrusting up against Jack. "No teasing."

Jack grinned. Ennis could feel his teeth against his neck. "I never got the chance to make my fantasies real two months ago," Jack said then lifted his head and looked into Ennis' eyes. "And I've dreamed of so much."

The lust in Jack's eyes was driving Ennis wild. He hooked a leg over Jack's. "Whatever you dreamed," he said. "Get it done already." He pulled Jack's face down and kissed him, moving his hips against Jack. "Fuck me," he whispered against Jack's lips.

Jack pulled back, taken by surprise. "You sure?" he asked. "We ain't had that much experience."

"I know how to fuck, Jack."

"Yeah, but do you want to take it?"

"Just from you," Ennis said. He wouldn't say anything, but Jack could see it in those deep, brown eyes. Love.

Without looking away from Ennis, Jack spit in his hand then moved it down to Ennis' entrance. Ennis spread his legs more, clenching his teeth as he felt Jack's finger push inside slowly. Jack moved his finger in and out. By the time he added another finger, Ennis was arching into him, pleasuring coursing through every inch of his body. Jack kissed him then pulled his fingers out and replaced them with his cock, pushing deep inside Ennis.

Ennis groaned, hissing between his teeth as the pain faded. Pleasure overcame everything as Jack started moving, lifting Ennis' legs to thrust in deeper. Ennis arched his back, taking every inch of Jack. "Fuck," he groaned, holding onto Jack.

"Hang in there, bud," Jack said then started thrusting in and out faster, getting louder moan out of Ennis. Jack's moans merged into Ennis' as they kissed. The bed creaked as they moved, threatening to break but it remained strong. There was only the subtle movement of the trailer.

Jack stroked Ennis as he moved, feeling Ennis tighten around him, already reaching his climax. Jack fucked him through his orgasm, moving faster as he reached his own. Jack let out a long groan as he came then collapsed on top of Ennis.

Ennis wrapped his arms around Jack, kissing his forehead. Jack pulled out and nuzzled up against Ennis. They fell asleep happy. 


	21. Free Weekend

Ennis woke up to the sound of persistent knocking. He groaned, his head throbbing as he shifted on the bed, nearly jumping out of his skin when he felt a body lying behind him, an arm wrapped around him. He looked over his shoulder at Jack sleeping soundly. He smiled to himself then looked at the door when the knocking continued. He quietly and gently slipped away from Jack then pulled on some clothes, slipping his boots on and grabbing his jacket as he walked over to the door, opening it and stepping outside.

"Alma," Ennis said, quickly closing the door behind him as he saw her standing there. He put his jacket on. The morning was a bit chilly. "What are you doin' here?"

"To ask you a question," Alma said, crossing her arms. She nodded toward the car. "You have company?"

"Uh..." Ennis said, looking toward the car then back at her. "Just someone from the ranch. Needed a place to stay."

"Ennis-"

"What'd you want to ask?" Ennis asked. She knew about him and Jack, but he wasn't about to say anything about Jack staying here with anybody. He was tempted to just forget everything and head to Brokeback Mountain with Jack to get away for a while.

"It's about this weekend," Alma said. "Monroe wants to take me and the girls out of town for a trip. The girls are excited about it, but I know that you have them this weekend-"

"It's fine," Ennis said, feeling bad for being relieved that he wouldn't have the girls this weekend. "I've made plans anyway. Plans that the girls wouldn't want to-"

"Great," Alma said, just wanting this encounter to be over with. The feeling was mutual. "Well, then I better go tell the girls." She turned and started back toward her car but then stopped and turned back. "I'll make it up to you. Any time next week...you can take the girls."

"Thanks, Alma," Ennis said, not too surprised by this. She was probably just hoping for some alone time with Monroe. But...he HAD noticed that she wasn't as bitter toward him as before. He didn't know what had changed, but was grateful for it. Maybe moving out of town had helped. "See ya next week."

Alma nodded her head then turned and got in the car. Ennis watched her drive off then waited until her car was merely a dot then turned and headed back into the trailer, seeing Jack standing by the window looking out. Ennis closed the door then started looking for some food to fix breakfast.

"Thought you were divorced," Jack said, wearing only his jeans. He sat back down on the bed and leaned back, his eyes never leaving Ennis.

"We are," Ennis said. "She don't come around often. And when she does, it's only about the girls."

"So this weekend...?"

"She's taking the girls on a trip with a friend," Ennis said, making a mental note to get some coffee. He looked in the freezer and grabbed the fish, deciding a fire was a good idea right now in the chilly weather. He got what he needed then headed outside to the fire pit.

Ennis was just starting the fire when Jack stepped out of the trailer fully dressed. Ennis put the fish on, keeping an eye on it while remaining by the fire for warmth. Jack pulled a chair over and sat down, staring at Ennis though Ennis tried to ignore it.

After a few minutes, Ennis couldn't take it anymore. "What?" he asked without looking at Jack.

Jack didn't say anything for a moment but his gaze moved away from Ennis. "Food ready yet?"

"You're not gonna say anything about my free weekend?" Ennis asked, looking over at Jack.

Jack shrugged, looking back at Ennis. "I figured that if you wanted to go up to Brokeback, you'd just tell me," he said. "We can have just as much time here as-"

"Except for privacy."

Jack was silent for a moment, looking around them. He finally looked back at Ennis. "You're in the middle of nowhere," he said. "Who the fuck is gonna see us?"

"Alma."

"She's gonna be gone this weekend," Jack reminded him. "You said so yourself."

"So, you don't wanna go to Brokeback?"

"Yes, I want to go to Brokeback."

"Then why the hell are we havin' this discussion?"

Jack got to his feet. "Do you WANT to go?" he asked. "I'll stick by with the whole hidin' thing. I told you that it was no one's business but ours. I'm fine with that. But are you willing to just up and go-"

"I have nothing else, Jack," Ennis said, finding that it wasn't so difficult to open up to Jack. "No job. Alma hates me. And probably fuckin' Monroe. My girls hardly see me. I don't get all the weekends I'm allowed-"

"You do have one thing."

"And what's that?"

"Me."

Ennis shifted his weight from one foot to the other then looked away from Jack and knelt down, checking on the fish. Which was nearly done. He kept his attention on that for a moment, though he was thinking about what Jack had said.

"I know this is hard for you," Jack said, breaking the silence. "You took the leap two months ago. You practically said 'fuck my job' and headed down to Texas with me, staying there for longer than you planned because I asked ya to."

Ennis lowered his gaze, setting the fish off the fire. He picked up the plate then kicked some dirt onto the fire, putting it out. "Alma knows about us," he said then turned to Jack. He couldn't read the expression on Jack's face. "If I go now-"

"You're sayin' no to Brokeback?" Jack asked. "After just askin' 'bout why I was saying we might not go?"

"Jack-"

"Who the hell cares if Alma knows?" Jack asked. "She's clearly not doin' anything about it."

"Because of the girls."

"She's groomin' a new father for 'em."

"I'm still-"

"Just talk to me," Jack said, stepping over to Ennis. "We're alone. No one's around for miles. No one can hear you. I just wanna know what's goin' on in that head of yours."

Ennis hesitated for a moment. "I want to go to Brokeback with you," he said since that would provide them with privacy that they had never had before. Privacy that he was craving because he was still in fear here that someone would notice. It wasn't often, but cars still came down the road. He had his privacy alone, but with Jack hanging around..."Hell, I'd go anywhere with you."

Jack smiled, his face brightening up. "Should I give the credit to you quittin' that damn job of yours?" he asked. "We probably wouldn't be here right now otherwise."

"I didn't quit that job because of you," Ennis said, though that was partly a lie. "And only god knows where we'd be right now if I hadn't quit." It had only been the last few weeks or so where he had been thinking of several possibilities of where his life would be right now if he had either stayed down in Texas with Jack or had gone up to work for Aguirre back in '63. And he hadn't been able to think of a good enough life since it always ended with one of them facing the consequences for being the way they were.

He still couldn't put a name on what they were because he just couldn't view himself as queer. No matter how he felt about Jack.

How did he feel about Jack?

"So, are we goin' to Brokeback?" Jack asked. Despite what had earlier been said, he looked hopeful that Ennis would give him a positive answer. And how could Ennis do anything but say yes? He had already told Alma he had plans, after all. He could have said that he wanted to see the girls. Instead, he had put Jack ahead of them. Was that the best choice? He didn't know but he didn't feel like he wanted to take it back.

"Yeah, we're goin' to Brokeback," Ennis said, walking past Jack and heading for the trailer. He smiled to himself as he heard Jack's excited whoop behind him. He opened the door to the trailer and headed inside. 


	22. Admit It

They took Ennis' truck up to Brokeback, leaving not long after they ate breakfast. Jack wanted to get there in good time only because he really didn't know how much time he would ever have with Ennis. Sometimes it seemed like Ennis was fine with the way things were and would get the hell out of Wyoming. Other times, Ennis would close up and make all sorts of excuses as to why he couldn't leave Riverton. Maybe time on Brokeback would help him realize how much they meant to each other. Jack wouldn't force him to head to Texas with him, but he was going to leave that suggestion open at all times and squeeze it in whenever he could.

But, would Ennis listen?

When they made it up on the mountain and as they set up camp, Jack couldn't stop thinking about the time he had almost worked with Ennis here. He was glad he hadn't missed out on meeting Ennis, but he had come really close to never even knowing the other existed. It was a bit funny to think that he had met Ennis just because he hadn't let go of that shitty truck of his.

"I bet we can get a lot of fishin' done," Ennis said, checking the tent. If Jack didn't know him, Ennis would just seem like a perfectionist. But, Ennis was just checking the tent to give himself something to do other than face the fact that he was ALONE with Jack up here. Jack was tempted to tell him to just give in to whatever desires he had. Might take him a moment to feel free and able to express what he couldn't at home.

"Did we bring any fishin' gear?" Jack asked, lighting a cigarette. He kicked a rock absentmindedly then turned to Ennis. "There's other things to do besides fishin'."

Ennis remained standing by the tent, but looked at Jack. "Jack-"

"Ever go on a trip with Alma?" Jack asked, walking over to a stump and sitting down on it. He took a long drag. "Y'know, just the two o' ya?"

Ennis stuck his hands in his jacket pockets, looking at the tent once more before walking over to where Jack was sitting. "The only time we left Riverton was to visit her parents outta town," he said. "Did the trip in one day. Got back home late."

"So...no...'romantic' getaways?"

"Why you askin' 'bout this?" Ennis asked. "After only a few years of marriage, it's over. The only time we went on a date was before we were married. And the only dates we went on were with her parents."

"No wonder she put you through hell," Jack said. "Her parents raised her that way."

"If you want to get to know me," Ennis said, sounding pissed. He didn't want anything to do with Alma, but he was sure not going to let anyone talk bad about her still. "Don't ask about Alma."

"I DO know you," Jack said. "But since you don't ever wanna talk-"

Ennis turned and put distance between them again, making Jack regret ever opening his mouth. "It's not that I don't wanna talk," he said. "I just don't know what the hell I'm doin' around you most of the time."

"Sure as hell ain't no 'thing,' " Jack said, standing up and dropping the cigarette. He stomped it out and looked around them, trying to enjoy the piece and quiet and not turn this into an argument.

"Do you expect this to go on forever?"

Jack tried to push back the hurt he felt from that question, but it was hard. He turned to Ennis. "Why can't it?" he asked. "No matter how long it lasts, I wanna make it count. Our own forever."

"I ain't gettin' killed-"

"I'd gladly give my life if it meant I couldn't have you."

"Jack-"

"You want me to be quiet about us, I am!" Jack said. He gestured around. "There ain't anyone out here to see us." He dropped his arms to his sides and walked over to Ennis. "How long will it take you to realize we can do whatever the hell we want up here?"

"Only for three days."

"Unless otherwise decided."

Ennis squared his shoulders then turned away from Jack. For a moment, Jack thought that he was just going to walk away, but he didn't. He turned back after a minute or two. "We can't stay up here longer than three days," he said. "Alma will be back and if I'm not home-"

"She'll see that car and either think you're busy or out with someone," Jack said, wondering if Alma was even smart enough to put the pieces together and find out that the person Ennis was out with was Jack. Of course, all she would have to notice would be the Texan license places. "She shouldn't even be comin' to your place anyway. She was the one that wanted to divorce you so badly."

"She still wants me to be there for the girls," Ennis said. "And I don't have a phone at the trailer, so she HAS to come over. But, she avoids it when she can. Most of the time she just waits until I'm in town." He shook his head. "Why're we talkin' 'bout Alma again?"

"You brought her up."

"Then I need to throw her back down," Ennis said. Jack just grinned in amusement. "Do you wanna get a fire goin'?"

"If you're cold, we don't need a fire."

"I'm hungry," Ennis said. "How else are we gonna cook our food?"

"I guess you have a point."

"I guess so," Ennis said then walked around Jack to make a fire pit. Jack headed off to the side a short ways and gathered up some wood then brought it back and helped Ennis set it up before lighting it up.

A few hours later, Jack sat on the dirt, leaning back against the stump and ignoring the rocks that poked into his ass with every movement he made. Ennis had rinsed the dishes off in the river then came back to add some more firewood to the fire. The sun was going down behind him and Jack just watched, holding back the comment that with the sun behind him like that, it looked like Ennis had descended from heaven. The moment was gone when Ennis moved over to where Jack was sitting and planted his rear end beside him, but not on the ground.

"You're bein' quiet," Ennis said, breaking the silence.

Jack crossed his arms and looked over at Ennis, angling his head back a bit to look up at him. "Thought you preferred the silence," he said.

"Not after an argument."

Jack looked forward and watched the fire. "Not much of an argument," he said. "Just can't keep my damn trap shut."

Ennis was silent and Jack got the feeling that he had AGAIN upset Ennis without knowing why or even meaning to. "Did you mean it?" Ennis asked after a moment. He looked over at Jack and Jack knew that what was said here was going to be really hard for Ennis. It was a big step to even ask what he had.

"What do you mean?" Jack asked, looking at Ennis.

"That you'd gladly give your life if you couldn't have me."

"Oh," Jack said then looked back forward. "Wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it."

"And what does it mean?"

Jack got up off the ground, dusting himself off before sitting on the stump. He tossed a stick onto the fire then looked over at Ennis, his elbows propped on his knees. "Did you ever love Alma?" he asked. "Like, really love her?"

Ennis put a lot of thought into his answer. He didn't say anything for what seemed like forever. "I honestly don't know what love feels like," he said. "Once upon a time, I DID care about Alma, but I don't think it ever got around to love."

"I've felt love before," Jack said, watching the fire. "Nothing that ever meant anything-"

"How'd you know it was love then?"

"There's different types of love," Jack said, afraid to admit the love he felt for Ennis. He knew it was love. What else could it be? There was always an emptiness inside him whenever he wasn't with Ennis. That COULD mean anything, but Jack knew in his heart how he felt about the cowboy sitting next to him. "If you love something, you'd give your life for it." Would even that smallest confession scare Ennis away?

"I hope you stick around for a while then," Ennis said, using a branch to stir the fire. "I wanna know what love feels like." Jack looked at him, wondering if there was a deeper meaning behind his words. Was he admitting to feelings he had for Jack, or did he just want to talk so if he ever found love, he'd know it?

"I'll stick around as long as I can," Jack said and added in his head: And as long as you want me.

They spent the rest of the evening just hanging by the fire, neither of them saying anything. Jack, back in his position on the ground leaning against the stump, dozed off a few times, knowing as it got later that it was about time to head to bed. He looked over at Ennis, who was just watching nature. There was nothing out there and in the dark, you couldn't see much of anthing, but Ennis obviously found something out there. Unless he was thinking. Then he probably wouldn't pay attention to anything he saw out there.

Jack reached over and tapped him on the arm. Ennis looked down at him. "Time to turn in?" Jack asked with a yawn as he got to his feet.

"I'll be a minute," Ennis said. "Fire's still goin'."

Jack didn't point out that they could just throw some dirt on the fire. "Don't stay out to late," he said then headed for the tent and climbed in.

Ennis watched as Jack headed into the tent for the night. He looked back at the fire, noticing that it was going out pretty quickly. He kicked some dirt on it then just sat there in the moonlight for a moment. He had been constantly thinking about the conversation he and Jack had had earlier this evening. Mostly he had been trying to figure out if Jack had confessed his feelings or else had just used it as an example. From the emotion in Jack's voice, Ennis was pretty sure that it hadn't been said as an example.

What was he going to do about it?

Ennis glanced toward the tent, wondering if Jack was waiting for him or if he had just gone ahead and went to bed. He got to his feet and walked over to the tent, pushing the flap aside and seeing that Jack was already asleep. And snoring. He slipped into the tent behind Jack, putting his arm around the rodeo cowboy. Jack shifted back against him, but didn't wake up. Ennis laid his head down and fell asleep.


	23. Unobserved

Ennis woke up the next morning by Jack's kisses. He was well rested and the feeling of Jack's touch reminded him that they were alone up here. Unobserved. Free to do what they wanted, when they wanted, how they wanted. Ennis captured Jack's lips with his own, feeling Jack's body react and press closer. Ennis moved his hands down the front of Jack's shirt, stopping when Jack pulled away and grabbed his hands. The feeling of rejection rose inside Ennis. After that talk last night, how could Jack do this to him now?

Reminding himself of that talk, Ennis wanted to clear something up right here, right now. A way to prevent Jack from ever rejecting him again.

But, Ennis didn't have time to say anything. "It's warm out," Jack said, a smile on his face. "Thought we could go for a swim before the weather messes everything up."

"A swim?" Ennis asked then watched as Jack climbed off of him and headed out of the tent. He sighed then pushed himself up and climbed out of the tent. As Jack had said, it WAS warm, but storm clouds could be seen in the distance, promising rain later this afternoon. He walked around the fire pit and headed after Jack, who was walking down the short path to the river in view.

Ennis stopped on the path, watching as Jack stood near the edge of the water. The current was slow-moving, letting them know that it was safe to go in without the fear of being washed downstream. He knew further down it was worse. All of those thoughts departed from him as he watched Jack strip down. His eyes were glued to that body that he had grown to love so much. Yes, love, but not the same type of love that Jack had been talking about yesterday. Ennis wanted to continue that conversation, but when was a good time?

Once naked, Jack stepped into the water, wading a bit further in before he turned and saw Ennis still on the path. "What're you waitin' for?" he asked, that same smile still on his face. "The water's great!" He splashed around the ducked under.

Ennis walked forward, knowing he should just let himself enjoy the time he had with Jack and let the conversation go where it wanted. He discarded his clothes on the rocks then joined Jack in the water. It was warmer than he expected and not exactly clear, but at least there were no unwelcome visitors swimming around with them. Jack waded through the water, closer to Ennis. Ennis knew Jack was doing his best to make things more comfortable for Ennis. And, good god, it was working.

"This is great, ain't it?" Jack asked, laying back to float on the water. The current floated him back toward Ennis. When he stood, his body was nearly pressed againt's Ennis'. Ennis found himself watching the water fall down over his chest. "Better than fishing?"

Ennis nodded, wiping water off of Jack's chest. When his gaze lifted, he found those blue eyes staring intently at him. "We're not gonna get a lot of fishin' done, are we?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

Jack had a mischevious look in his eyes. "Unless you wanna fish," he said, the corner of his mouth turned up in a smile.

"Depends on what I'm fishin' for."

Glee lit up in Jack's eyes. He backed away from Ennis, lowering himself in the water. "You're gonna have to fight for this catch," he said.

Ennis gave a small smile. "Damn you, Jack fuckin' Twist," he said then started after Jack.

The morning was spent splashing and swimming around, chasing each other around in the water. They hardly got the satisfaction of catching the other since the chase was much more exciting. After a while, they tired out and lay on the grass to dry. Once the weather started getting cooler, they got up and dressed then started a fire, eating something small for breakfast before they started cooking lunch. When it started raining, they grabbed the food and headed into the tent.

Ennis enjoyed listening to the rain as he ate, breathing in the fresh air and smell of rain. He pinned the tent flap back a bit so he could watch the rain. Jack was lying near the back of the tent, mostly just watching Ennis.

"So," Ennis said, shifting a little and looking at Jack. "What are our plans for the rest of the day?"

"Well, since I had you naked and wet-"

"I'm not havin' sex in the rain."

"Damn. My goal was to catch a cold while up here," Jack said a bit sarcastically, but he was only teasing. He sat up and looked at Ennis. "Don't tell me sex hasn't been on your mind since this morning."

Ennis thought back to spending the morning naked in the water with Jack. He looked at the other and answered honestly. "I actually haven't," he said. "I've had a lot on my mind." He looked away from Jack.

"Anything you wanna talk about?"

"Yeah," Ennis said. "But, you ruined my chance when you suggested a swim."

Jack clearly didn't know where this was going, but he wasn't going to do anything that would keep Ennis from talking. "Your chance for what?" he asked, sounding regretful. He didn't even know what Ennis was going to say and already regretted ruining it?

"I had a lot of thinkin' after our talk yesterday," Ennis said, still not looking at Jack. He probably wouldn't be able to get anything out of his mouth if he looked at Jack. "Y'know, 'bout...love." All he felt like doing right now was running and closing himself up somewhere. But, how could he close himself off from Jack? He took a deep breath and looked at Jack, seeing his fears confirmed. He found it difficult to get anything out. "You said you felt love before."

"I was just a kid then," Jack said. "With a wild imagination. Thought every girl in school would marry me." He smiled at the thought, unknowingly making things harder for Ennis to continue. "Are you thinkin' you've felt love before?"

"I love my girls," Ennis said, unable to get control of his mouth. "But-" They both jumped at the crack of thunder.

Jack reached past Ennis and unhooked the flap, letting it swing close before he tied it shut. When he was finished, he looked back at Ennis but didn't move away. Ennis didn't know how he was going to say anything he wanted.

So he said the first thing that came to mind: "I wanna go to Texas with you."

Jack looked surprised. So, of course he was taken aback enough to not even notice that that wasn't what Ennis really wanted to say. Since he was having so much trouble, he figured that that talk could wait. "Are you serious?" Jack asked.

Ennis gave a slow nod of his head. "You caught me at a good time," he said, knowing that if he had had some sort of job, he'd make excuses. Now there was nothing to tie him to Wyoming. After all, wasn't Alma grooming another man to replace him? That thought made him rethink his decision, but he would always find ways to see his girls.

The surprised look turned into a wide smile. "You make me the happiest-" Ennis cut him off with a kiss because he just couldn't stand to hear those words when he was unable to say more in return. Jack was satisfied with this turn of events, returning the kiss as he laid back, pulling Ennis back with him. Ennis straddled Jack's hips as they laid there, lips practically glued together.

When Jack moved his hands toward Ennis' jeans, Ennis stopped him. Breaking the kiss, Ennis looked into Jack's eyes then moved down his body. Jack sat up slightly as Ennis started unfastening Jack's jeans. He lifted his hips so Ennis could pull his jeans down, along with his underwear. Jack laid back down with a moan as Ennis took him into his mouth, resisting the urge to thrust his hips into that warm, heavenly feeling.

Whether or not he was doing this right didn't matter to either of them. Ennis knew how to please Jack. And if he couldn't say what he wanted, maybe he could show it in his actions. Actions that were getting the right response from Jack.

When Ennis released Jack's cock, Jack looked at him but said nothing. It took a bit of maneuvering to get naked in such a small space. They got it accomplished rather quickly, though. Jack got on his hands and knees before Ennis and Ennis lovingly took him.

After an afternoon of sex, Ennis whispered 'I love you' the second before he drifted off to sleep. As Jack drifted off to sleep, he couldn't help but wonder if he had heard Ennis wrong. 


	24. Say It

"I love you." Whispered in the night by someone not fully coherent. It hadn't kept Jack from sleeping, but when he woke up early the next morning, that was all he could think about. He rolled over onto his side to watch Ennis' sleeping form, wondering what would be said when he woke up. Would he remember saying what he had? Or would he just remember telling Jack that he wanted to go to Texas with him? If Jack brought up the 'I love you,' would that change Ennis' decision about going? What was the best way to go about this? Jack wanted answers, but he didn't want to lose Ennis just because he wanted them.

Jack ran his hand lightly along Ennis' chest, losing himself in the ruggedness of Ennis' body. His perfect, heavenly body that Jack just couldn't get enough of. A body he had noticed the day they met. Jack could still picture Ennis standing by his truck after driving him a mile out of town to where the damn thing broke down. Hearing Ennis' voice for the first time at that store had hooked him. His looks had reeled him in. And that friendliness kept him hooked. Ennis HAD gone fishing and Jack was mighty grateful that he hadn't gotten thrown back out.

He placed his hand flat against Ennis' chest, feeling the beat of his heart. Jack could feel his own pounding. He slowly moved his hand down, along Ennis' abs and stomach. He rested his hand on his hip then leaned forward and planted a kiss on Ennis' shoulder. Ennis shifted slightly, but didn't wake up. Jack let his mind drift back to when he had been left alone with Ennis. Feeling Ennis' skin intimately beneath his hands for the first time. The moan that came from the ranch hand...

Any thought of Ennis got Jack hard. And he was aching right now. He moved his hand from Ennis' hip and grabbed his hand, lifting it and guiding it to his cock. He wrapped Ennis' fingers around it then slowly started thrusting into his hand, closing his eyes. When he felt Ennis stroking him, he opened his eyes to see that Ennis was awake. Jack smiled like he had gotten his hand caught in the cookie jar. Without releasing his cock, Ennis shifted slightly to lean over and kiss Jack. Returning the kiss, Jack grabbed the hair on the back of Ennis' neck, tugging him closer.

Ennis let go of Jack's cock and pulled Jack's body closer until their bodies were pressed together. Jack was still supporting himself upright with his other arm, but now just let himself relax, falling against Ennis until Ennis was lying on his back, Jack pressed against him. Jack didn't break the kiss, though he was dying to ask about last night. About words that Ennis might or might not have meant. Whether it was I love you or I wanna go to Texas. Jack would have his answers, but not soon enough.

"Jack," Ennis said, though Jack's lips were still pressed against his. Jack got the feeling that the brief happy moment was about to be shattered. A talk was coming. A talk that he should be looking forward to, but he was just too scared. Because Ennis could hurt him in ways he couldn't name. "We gotta talk."

Jack gave up and rose up slightly, looking down at Ennis. "Now?" he asked then glanced downwards to where his cock was standing at attention. He frowned when he saw that Ennis wasn't having a similar problem. He looked at Ennis. "How can you NOT think about sex?"

"I am," Ennis said and Jack could tell that he was going through some sort of struggle. "I don't wanna be distracted again."

Jack acted like the 'I love you' hadn't been muttered last night. "You already told me what I interrupted," he said. "As soon as we get back, I'll pack you up and take you off to Texas."

"Not what I meant."

"You don't wanna go now?"

"I'm not gonna talk about it just in case I DO change my mind," Ennis said and Jack tried not to let that hurt him. After all, Ennis WAS going. And if he didn't want to talk about it to keep that decision, that was fine by Jack.

"Then what is it?" Jack asked, feeling his pulse quicken, knowing what was coming. Hearing it last night hardly meant a thing. Now they were both fully awake. Jack didn't know how he would react to it and just waited for Ennis to say it.

The words that came out of Ennis' mouth were highly unexpected. "Today's our last day up here."

"Shit," Jack muttered, rolling off of Ennis. Sex was out of the question for the moment. He pulled his clothes on then his boots. He grabbed his jacket and looked at Ennis. "Shit." He shook his head then climbed out of the tent, pulling his jacket on. The day was cloudy and sprinkling. Bleak. Like his mood right now.

"Jack." He ignored Ennis calling for him.

Jack wasn't standing outside long before Ennis joined him, also fully dressed, completely erasing the intimacy. Make it easier to avoid the 'I love you' talk, but harder because Ennis wasn't talking about it. Jack kept his back to Ennis, saying nothing. Not even when Ennis came up behind him and wrapped his arms around him, resting his chin on Jack's shoulder. Jack would continue to give him the cold shoulder until something meaningful was said.

But why was he hoping for it? He knew how Ennis was. Ennis had said he didn't know what love felt like. Maybe Jack had just heard him wrong last night. How could someone say it if they didn't know what it felt like? That was it.

It didn't make him feel better. In fact, it put him in an even darker mood.

"Talk to me," Ennis murmured in his ear. His breath raised goosebumps on the back of Jack's neck, making it a bit difficult to concentrate. "What's up?"

Jack let out a long sigh, unconsciously leaning back into Ennis' embrace. "I just had a rough night," he said. "Didn't sleep good."

"Is it because we're leavin' today?"

"We don't have to."

"Jack."

"We're gonna be headin' down to Texas anyway," Jack said. "Can't we spend just a little while longer in complete privacy?"

"I have to talk to Alma about leavin.' "

"The second you bring up Texas-"

"Ain't none of her business."

"But she'll know-"

Ennis moved around to stand in front of him. "What's goin' on?" he asked. "You usually don't give a fuck about Alma."

"I still don't."

"Then what's with the fuss?"

Jack stared into those brown eyes that held his gaze. He couldn't look away and not opening up about what he really wanted to talk about would kill him. "I had a rough night because..." He paused for a moment then took a deep breath. "Because of what you said."

Ennis didn't know what he was talking about. "What I said when?"

"The last thing you said last night."

The confusion was on Ennis' face for only a short moment longer. He DID remember what he had said last night. How, Jack didn't know since Ennis had fallen asleep pretty much with the words on his tongue. He wanted to know what Ennis was thinking right now, but didn't want to push it.

"What I said-"

"Are you gonna deny it?" Jack asked. "Or make up excuses as to why you said it?"

Ennis looked appalled that Jack would even think that way. "Is that the way you think about me?"

"You're dodging the question."

"So are you."

Jack pursed his lips, but didn't turn away from Ennis. How could he when that would hurt him worse than Ennis? He didn't know that for sure, but it just seemed that way. "That's not how I think about you," he said. "I'm just scared that it's the truth."

Ennis looked uncomfortable with the emotion in Jack's voice. Jack was even more afraid that he had just did what he had always feared doing. Scaring Ennis off. The last thing he wanted. Ennis still didn't say anything after a few minutes and Jack knew that this was the end of things. Jack had pushed his luck too far and now Ennis didn't want to risk everything for them. Jack had risked and lost everything.

Jack was taken aback when Ennis put his arms around him and pulled him close in a tight hug. Jack returned the embrace, feeling his fears melting away just by the comfort of this touch. If Ennis let go...

"I meant it," Ennis said, his voice barely audible. "Just wish I said it differently."

Jack clung tightly to Ennis. "It still don't mean-"

"Jack..."

Jack pulled back and looked at him. "I'm takin' my chances," he said. "You gotta say it to my face to make me believe it."

"Jack-"

"Don't 'Jack' me," Jack said. He took a step back and spread his arms out from his sides. "I love you. I fuckin' love you!" It felt good to get that off his chest, but Ennis' expression just made him want to take it back. He dropped his arms to his sides, feeling as if his heart had gotten ripped out when Ennis turned away from him. "Ennis..." He stepped forward. "I shouldn't have-"

"Why is this so damn hard?" Ennis asked, kicking at the dirt and sending some rocks flying off into the trees. He still had his back to Jack, obviously just to hide his expression. "And why does it have to be like this?"

"Like this?" Jack asked. "You mean, two men?"

"It ain't normal."

"Yeah, well, it's reality," Jack said. "And I wouldn't change a damn thing."

Ennis shifted his weight from one foot to the other then turned around to face Jack. "You know how I feel," he said. "And you know-"

"No one can hear you here," Jack said, stepping closer to him. He wanted to take Ennis into his arms, but knew that Ennis would find some way to distract him so Ennis wouldn't have to say it. "You say it now, you won't have to ever say it again." What kind of compromise was that?!

"Jack-"

Jack cut him off with a kiss, feeling Ennis' body move closer to his own. They fit together perfectly. Surely Ennis could see that. The kiss went on for a bit longer until he could practically feel Ennis warring with himself. The kiss was broken and Ennis' eyes never left Jack's.

"I love you."

Jack smiled. "All I needed to hear," he said then kissed Ennis again. Ennis pushed him away then Jack allowed himself to be led back to the tent. 


	25. Lost Burden

Ennis was reluctant to leave, but knew it would be worth it. They packed up everything and headed out, making it back to Ennis' trailer later that evening. And ever since earlier that morning, when Ennis had told Jack how he felt, the smile on Jack's face hadn't left. Until they got to Ennis' trailer. Another car was there, parked by Jack's borrowed car. And standing at his door...

"Alma," Ennis said when he got out of the truck. He saw her look toward Jack with a surprised and disgusted look on her face. He looked over at Jack, who looked away from them both to grab the things out of the back of the truck. He looked away from Jack then walked over to Alma. "What're you doin' here?"

Alma was still glancing toward Jack every once in a while and he knew she wanted to demand to know why he was even there. "I need to talk to you about something important," she said, visibly forcing herself to keep her attention solely on Ennis.

"I need to talk to you, too," Ennis said, making sure he didn't look over at Jack. "You wanna go inside?"

"Come by the house," Alma said, uncomfortable being near Jack. She looked toward Jack then back at Ennis. "Maybe sometime in the morning." Was she thinking that Ennis would bring Jack along? Tonight or in the morning wouldn't make any difference. Jack wasn't going anywhere and Jack wouldn't want to go anywhere near Alma. Their revulsion for each other were different, but held just as much hate.

"I'll be by in the mornin' then," Ennis said then stepped aside as Alma practically ran for her car. He watched her get in then drive off. When he looked at Jack, who was leaning against the truck, the rodeo cowboy had that silly grin on his face again. "You ain't gonna bitch about Alma bein' here?"

"I think it was worth just seeing her reaction to me."

"Jack..."

"You should go by there tonight," Jack said. "Surprise her and then tell her you're gonna be gone by morning." He pushed away from the truck, taking his bag over to his car. He tossed it in through the window into the back seat.

"By morning?" Ennis asked. "That doesn't give me time-"

"Time for what?" Jack asked. "Sayin' goodbye to your ex-wife? Sayin' a few last words to two little girls who'd barely see you even if you stayed livin' out here." He wasn't trying to wound Ennis, but his words still hurt. "Don't you just wanna run away from it all?"

"I'd prefer to."

"You'd PREFER to," Jack said, putting some emphasis on the word. He put his hands on his hips then shook his head. "God dammit, Ennis." He looked at Ennis, stepping away from the car. "Up on Brokeback, you were ready to go. Get back home to find Alma waitin' for you, you change your mind."

"I-"

"You're a family man, I'm okay with that," Jack said. He lowered his arms to his sides then closed the distance between them. "You won't lose them forever. They'll still know their dad. And when they're older, maybe they'll have some sense about 'em and want to live with you."

Ennis wasn't too happy about that idea. Because of the fact that he didn't want his girls exposed to two men living together? Did he not want them to know who he really was? This was who he was, whether he accepted it or not. They would still love him no matter what, right? Unless Alma would get to them too much then having any sort of future relationship with his daughters was nonexistent.

"Ennis?"

Ennis pulled himself out of his thoughts. "I don't want to consider not goin' with you to Texas," he said, meaning every word. "But-"

"Please don't 'but' me."

"Jack," Ennis said, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. "Just...give me time."

"That's all I've been givin' you," Jack said, taking a few steps away from Ennis. "Can't I EVER just have a moment where the things you tell me are the truth?"

"I've never lied-"

"What's holdin' you here?"

"My girls-"

"Bullshit."

Ennis reacted as if he had gotten punched in the gut. "Excuse me?"

"This ain't about your girls," Jack said with a shake of his head. "It's about Alma."

"No, it's not."

"Prove it."

Ennis stood there for a moment then walked back around the truck and climbed into the driver's seat, slamming the door shut. He started the truck then looked at Jack, who was just watching him. Ennis looked away then turned the truck away from the trailer and headed down the road and into town. He pulled up to the house and parked then got out and headed to the front door and knocked.

When the door opened, Alma wasn't too surprised to see him. She opened the door wider, inviting him in with a gesture of her hand, though she didn't look too welcoming. She closed the door once he was inside. Monroe was sitting at the table, drinking a cup of coffee and set it down when his eyes met Ennis'. Ennis looked away and stepped inside further then turned to Alma.

"I'm not askin' for permission or your blessing," Alma said. "We're gettin' married and I just wanted to let you know that we'll be movin' to a different part of town. We'll give you the address-"

"Won't matter," Ennis said. "I'm goin' to Texas." He didn't know how much Alma had told Monroe, but could see that Monroe was just curious about why Texas. Alma, on the other hand, she knew that he was running away with Jack. He didn't care. He was in the mood to commit to something. And they would have to leave tonight before Ennis changed his mind once again. "I'll write and call-"

"This was a spur of the moment," Alma said, her voice deep with anger. Monroe looked at her with the same curiosity.

"Not really," Ennis said with a shake of his head. He really needed to get out of here right now. "I just want you to know...you're not tyin' me down to Riverton. You can shun me and prevent me from seein' my girls as often, but you can't tie me down."

"I don't have you tied down anywhere."

"I'm not here because of you," Ennis said. He looked at Monroe. "Congratulations. I hope you're happy." He looked at Alma once more then showed himself to the door. He thought that maybe he should have went to talk to the girls, but he didn't want to turn around and go back in there. His life with Alma was supposed to be over. And now it was completely. He felt a little bit more free now.

He got into his truck and headed back to his trailer. It was dark by the time he made it back, frowning when he saw Jack lying on the hood of his car. He probably should have unlocked the door before storming off like he had. Jack sat up as Ennis pulled up and parked then got out of the truck. Jack hopped off the hood, but didn't walk over to greet Ennis.

"So..." Jack started. "What-"

"I told Alma I'm goin' to Texas," Ennis said. "And that she wasn't tyin' me down in Texas."

"I never said-"

"It was implied," Ennis said then headed over to his trailer and unlocked the door. He opened the door and stepped inside. Jack followed him in. "I've still got a few arrangements to make. Like returnin' the trailer to its owner, but we might be able to leave tomorrow morning, late, or tomorrow afternoon."

"And just telling Alma sealed this?" Jack asked, just standing there staring at Ennis with a bit of surprise.

Ennis turned to him. "I think opening up did it," he said since he was normally closed up and silent around everyone. Only with Jack had he started loosening up a bit. "I don't think I've come to grips with how frightening that moment had been."

"Frightening?" Jack asked, a small grin on his face. "Your ex scares the shit outta you?"

"It's a different type of fear," Ennis said since he was mostly just worried that she would bring his and Jack's relationship out in the open and ruin him completely. If he didn't get killed for it, he would have left anyway.

"At least you won't have to worry about her anymore," Jack said, sitting down on the bed and leaning back to prop back on his elbows.

"Yeah," Ennis said, taking off his jacket. Jack stuck his leg out and pushed Ennis over to where he was standing in front of him. Ennis couldn't resist that grin as Jack laid back, unzipping his jacket then starting on his shirt buttons. "I have to pack, Jack."

"It shouldn't be too hard to grab everything and throw it in the back of your truck," Jack said, untucking his shirt to finish unbuttoning it. His undershirt was visible beneath. He was wearing way too many items of clothing. "Unless you wanna spend the next twelve to fourteen hours alone in the car with me." He winked at Ennis. "Spacious back seat."

Ennis got on the bed, positioning his body against Jack's. He looked into Jack's eyes. "I'm not dumpin' my truck just to get more time with you," he said. "No matter how tempting."

Jack grinned then pulled Ennis down for a kiss. 


	26. Stop For the Night

By the time they got everything packed and loaded onto Ennis' truck, it wasn't even midmorning. Ennis took the trailer back to the owner even though he had been paying for it to own it. He didn't ask for any of his money back, though his money was returned to him anyway. He thanked the owner, who wished him a safe trip then Ennis headed back to meet up with Jack. Before noon, they were headed down the road.

Finally heading away for good helped Ennis some. He sometimes found himself looking back and would quickly put his attention forward when he started to feel regret coming upon him. He didn't want to regret anything he was doing right now even if he had been raised to view what he was doing right now as wrong. As a kid, his dad had shown him and his brother what happened when two men lived together. It hadn't been a pretty sight and it had traumatized Ennis. Part of the reason why Ennis was so afraid of pursuing things with Jack.

In private, things were fine. It was just the fact that this decision, moving to Texas with Jack, was known. And only Alma knew the real reason behind it. Still, making any public decision when it included Jack made Ennis feel hesitant. As if the people that saw him KNEW. He couldn't help but wonder if Jack got the same feeling and was too afraid to ask. It would be hard to live when he saw the people that looked at him look at him like he was the Devil himself walking the earth with what he was doing.

These thoughts plagued Ennis for hours until their first stop. It was about four in the afternoon, but they were stopping for lunch. They pulled over to the side of the road and Ennis joined Jack in the car for some sandwhiches that Jack had brought along from Texas.

"Were you plannin' a longer trip?" Ennis asked, commenting on how many sandwhiches had been packed in the backseat. There was enough for two trips to Texas and back.

"I WAS plannin' on stickin' around Wyoming longer," Jack said. "If you wouldn't have me, I'd live out of the car. I needed something to eat." He smiled as he took a bite of his sandwhich.

Ennis shook his head slightly then went back to eating. They ate in silence for a while, the only sound was the breeze blowing in through the windows. Ennis finished his sandwhich, brushing the crumbs off the front of his jacket.

"Somethin' on your mind, friend?"

Ennis looked over at Jack. "What d'ya mean?" he asked, shifting slightly in his seat.

"You've been quiet before," Jack said. "But this quiet has a new feel to it."

Ennis looked down, brushing more crumbs off his jeans. He was using that as a distraction and stalled. He wet his lips then looked forward. "You ever..." he started, unsure of how to go about asking. "Ever feel like you're an open book?" He looked over at Jack. "People look at you funny...Like they KNOW?"

Jack shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. "If you're right," he said. "I guess I'm just oblivious to the world." He looked down at his half-eaten sandwhich, looking like he was pondering on whether or not to eat the rest of it.

"This ain't a joke, Jack."

Jack lowered his sandwhich and looked at Ennis. "If you feel that way, it's best that we're goin' to Texas," he said. "No one knows you there, so they'll just know you're my friend. Nothin' more."

"Maybe," Ennis said. He opened the door to get out then paused and turned back when Jack said his name.

Jack leaned over toward him. "Things'll get better in Texas," he said. "I promise you that."

Ennis nodded then pushed the door open the rest of the way and got out. He closed the door then walked back over to his truck and got in, starting it just as Jack started to pull back onto the road. He checked to see if anything was coming then pulled out behind Jack and continued on their way.

They stopped for the night at a hotel even though Ennis felt like just driving on through. He waited in the truck while Jack got them a room and decided that stopping was a good idea. The longer he sat there, the more tired he felt. When Jack waved him over, Ennis got out of the truck and followed him to their room. Jack opened the door and stepped inside, pulling the curtain closed and turning on the light. Ennis walked in, closing the door.

"Wanna sleep in?" Jack asked, pulling off his jacket. He dropped it on one of the beds then sat down on the other, pulling his boots off and letting them clatter to the floor. "We made good time today."

"Could've been sleepin' at your place if we kept on goin'," Ennis said, taking off his jacket. He fought back a yawn and failed.

"Are you really tired?" Jack asked. "Or just fakin' cause you don't wanna fuck me?"

"You're always in the mood for that."

"Well, I hardly get it..." Jack trailed off when Ennis tossed his jacket aside then came over, pushing Jack backward to lay down. Jack scooted back on the bed with Ennis following, straddling Jack's hips as he swooped down and caught Jack's lips with his own.

Jack buried his fingers in Ennis' hair as Ennis gripped the bed tightly. Jack thrusted his hips upwards against Ennis then slowly moved his hands down, practically hearing Ennis' heart beat faster as his fingers glided down Ennis' neck then down the front of his shirt, stopping with his palm pressed flat against Ennis' chest to feel his heartbeat. Ennis' breath was starting to come in pants. Jack didn't think he was doing anything exciting. Which meant that Ennis had been wanting this all day.

Ennis released the bed when his knuckles started aching. Jack started unbuttoning Ennis' shirt slowly, driving Ennis wild. He broke the kiss and pulled away, but that didn't make Jack move any faster. If anything, he was moving slower. Blue eyes met brown and Ennis was just lost, wanting the man beneath him even more. He wished more time had been spent up on Brokeback. He just felt as if he had wasted valuable time. Time they'd never get back if...

Jack untucked Ennis' shirt and finished unbuttoning it then rolled them over, grinding his hips against Ennis' before he pushed Ennis' undershirt up inch by slow fucking inch, planting kisses on Ennis' stomach and chest the higher the shirt was inched up. Ennis lifted his arms and pulled off both shirts, groaning when Jack took a nipple between his teeth. Jack moved his hands up Ennis' sides then arms, keeping Ennis' arms raised above his head. Ennis gripped the edge of the bed again, completely under Jack's control even though he really wanted to fuck him right now.

Mumbling 'I love you,' Jack moved down Ennis' body, kneeling on the floor as he worked on getting Ennis' jeans off of him. When Ennis moved to help, Jack smacked his hand and told him to keep those arms above his head. Ennis couldn't fight the grin that appeared on his face. He lifted his hips and Jack finished stripping him. He closed his eyes as Jack started stroking him, moving his other hand up and down the inside of Ennis' thigh.

Ennis squirmed then couldn't help grabbing Jack's head when he took Ennis into his mouth and deepthroating him. When Jack started gagging, Ennis let go of him and Jack started bobbing his head up and down his shaft, making all kinds of good noises come out of Ennis.

"Jack," Ennis said with what sounded like great difficulty. "You're still fullly dressed."

Jack pulled away from Ennis' cock, but still continued to stroke him. When Ennis closed his eyes and started thrusting into Jack's hand, Jack released him and got to his feet. Ennis watched as he pulled off all of his clothes then climbed onto the bed and straddled Ennis. He reached around and grabbed Ennis' cock. Ennis reached down and helped guide his cock to Jack's entrance. Jack lowered himself onto Ennis' cock, groaning when Ennis thrusted up and pulled him down at the same time.

"Fuck," Jack mumbled, leaning forward as Ennis fucked him from beneath. He closed his eyes then Ennis rolled them over and took over, thrusting deeper and harder. Jack stroked himself as Ennis fucked him. "Shiiit." He was already cumming. "Harder."

When Jack came once again, Ennis slowed his thrusts, moving in and out of Jack at his own pace. Jack pulled Ennis down for a kiss and Ennis paused in his thrusts, lost in Jack's lips. Jack wrapped his arms around Ennis, muscles tightening around Ennis as Ennis continued to fuck him. When Jack came again, Ennis was right behind him. He thrusted a few more times then pulled out and collapsed onto the bed beside Jack.

"I look forward to getting home," Jack said.

Ennis rolled over, laying his head on Jack's chest. "What for?" he asked.

"That bed needs some work."

Ennis shook his head then closed his eyes.  



	27. New Start

Ennis rolled over to go back to sleep when Jack pulled the curtain back and let the sun shine in. He smirked to himself at Ennis' annoyed grumble before burying his face in the pillow and pulling the cover up over his head. Knowing he wouldn't get anywhere by annoying Ennis, Jack pulled the curtain back closed then walked over to the bed and yanked at the cover, but Ennis held on.

"You're the one that mentioned last night that we could've already been there," Jack said, sitting on the bed beside Ennis. "Now you want to sleep?" Ennis rolled over once again, putting his bare back to Jack. The cover barely hid that fine ass. "Are you gonna make me go without you?"

Ennis mumbled something unintelligable. Jack leaned forward. "What?" he asked which just made Ennis repeat the same way he had. "We're this close and you're gonna make things difficult?"

Ennis rolled over onto his back and looked at Jack. "You wouldn't leave me."

Jack smiled. "Damn right," he said. "If I DID leave you, you'd run right back to Alma."

"I wouldn't-"

"You were mumblin' about her in your sleep last night."

"Ain't my fault," Ennis said, sitting up. Jack had had his hands all over that body last night, but he REALLY wanted his hands on those shoulders again. Just like that morning he had been left alone at the house with Ennis. Would Jack ever tell him about that? "And just because I'm mumblin' about her in my sleep don't mean I'm gonna run back to her."

"Does part of you still love her?" Jack asked, wondering why he was even curious about that. Hadn't Ennis told him on Brokeback that he hadn't known what love felt like until Jack?

"I still care," Ennis said. He shook his head. "Why do we always have to talk about her?"

"I'm not the one talkin' 'bout my ex in my sleep."

Ennis gestured to himself and Jack. "I was raised to view this as wrong," he said, trying to get Jack to understand something. "Alma still has that mind set. And gettin' away from her will help me adjust to this. Just give me time."

"I got all the time in the world," Jack said. At times like this, it felt like he was just holding onto this relationship with his fingertips. And Ennis wasn't doing anything to keep it from falling apart. Those times weren't rare, but they'd fade over time. "Get dressed so we can get going."

"I don't get more sleep?"

"You can sleep when we get there," Jack said, getting up off the bed. "Unless you wanna sleep on the way. I don't really wanna lose you in a fiery car crash."

Ennis rolled his eyes then threw the cover back and got out of bed, grabbing for his clothes. Jack admired that ass for a moment then grabbed the room key and left to check out of the hotel.

A few minutes later, they were back on the road for the last leg of their journey.

Ennis was relieved when they finally made it. Jack was living in a different apartment, but it wasn't too much better than the one Ennis had seen last time he was here. With how well Jack's life had been going here, he would've thought Jack had gotten a house or something.

He parked the truck behind Jack then got out as Jack came over to the truck. "I'll show ya in then I gotta take the car back," Jack said. "It's just down the street. I can walk back and be back in about twenty minutes."

Ennis nodded, shoving back the feeling of being watched right now. "I'll probably get my things moved in before you get back," he said, sticking his hands in his pockets. "Unless I just pass out on the couch."

"If you're still tired," Jack said. "You really need to get more sleep more often."

"You've had me drivin' around everywhere since you arrived," Ennis said. "I think I'm allowed to be exhausted."

Jack grinned. "I promise I'll let you get more sleep tonight," he said with a wink.

Right now, Ennis wasn't sure he wanted Jack to keep that promise. "Can we go in now?" he asked.

Jack nodded then turned and led the way inside. His apartment was on the ground floor. He unlocked the door then led the way inside. He gave Ennis a quick tour then headed out to take the car back.

Ennis took his time bringing his things in, but he had so little that it didn't take long at all. He didn't really find a place for anything, so he just placed it down on the living room floor to wait until Jack got back. He sat down on the couch, sighing deeply. He scooted over when something crinkled underneath him. He pulled a piece of paper out of between the cushions and was about to toss it then paused when the words written on it caught his attention: Had a great time last night. Hope we can do it again. Randall.

He stuffed the paper back where he found it when he heard the door open. He got to his feet just as Jack walked over.

"I see you got everything moved in," Jack said. "I've got room in the bedroom-"

"I wasn't sure where to put everything," Ennis said, grabbing some of his things. He pushed that note out of his head. He was taking it the wrong way, that had to be it. He headed into the bedroom with Jack following with the rest of his things.

It didn't take them long to find everything a place. Jack leaned against the wall, arms crossed. "So," he said, watching Ennis. "How does it feel to live somewhere else?" There really were no words to describe how he was feeling about this arrangement.

Ennis pulled off his jacket, seeming distracted by something. Hopefully he wasn't having second thoughts. If that happened, Jack knew how exactly to get his mind back on track. "I haven't even been here an hour yet," Ennis said, not looking at Jack. He just stared down at the jacket in his hands. "The feeling hasn't settled in yet."

"Okay," Jack said, not about to ask what was bothering Ennis. He either wouldn't answer or he would avoid it and talk about something else. He pushed away from the wall. "Wanna get somethin' to eat? My friend said he could take us out for lunch."

"Your friend?"

Jack nodded. "The guy I borrowed the car from," he said. "Do you mind? If you wanna stay in-"

"It's fine," Ennis said, hanging his jacket in the closet. It was warm enough outside for him not to need it.

"Meeting new people will help you get comfortable round here," Jack said, thinking that that was what was bothering Ennis right now. He was nervous about living in a new place around people he didn't know. "Do you wanna go right now?"

Ennis hesitated a moment then nodded his head. Jack turned and left the bedroom with Ennis following. They headed out of the apartment then went down the street to Jack's friend's house. Jack introduced Ennis to Randall and his wife. Jack noticed a strange reaction from Ennis when he introduced Randall but pushed it away. It was probably nothing.

Instead of going out, Randall invited them inside where his wife had cooked them something. They sat around the table. Jack was sitting across from Ennis, unable not to notice that Ennis was acting like he didn't want to be here. Hopefully Jack was the only one to notice that. He would have to talk to Ennis later whether or not Ennis talked to him.

"Well, I'm glad to see you returned my car in pretty much the same condition when you borrowed it," Randall said when they fell into an uncomfortable silence. Even more uncomfortable since Ennis was doing nothing but staring down at his food.

"Yeah," Jack said, unable to take his eyes off Ennis. "The car's great."

"I know," Randall said, sounding as awkward as this meal felt. "So, Ennis..." Jack hoped Ennis wouldn't make things worse. "Jack's told me a lot about you." That made Ennis look up, but he didn't meet Jack's eyes. What the hell was wrong with him? "You lived in Wyoming?"

Ennis just nodded. Jack wanted to smack him.

Randall looked at Jack with the same feeling Jack was having. Ennis just picked at his food, not even trying to be a good guest. Randall was just trying to be nice and make Ennis feel welcome.

"Ennis," Jack said in a tone that said: Look at me. Ennis reluctantly lifted his eyes and looked at Jack. "Can I talk to you a minute? Outside?" He got to his feet, apologizing to Randall and his wife as Ennis got up and headed for the door. He followed Ennis out.

"If you're having second thoughts about comin' here," Jack said once they were alone. "Just tell me. Don't embarrass me in front of my friends. My good friends."

"Good friends?" Ennis asked. "Great." He turned away from Jack, kicking at the dirt.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothin'," Ennis said, pinching the bridge of his nose as if he had a headache. "I'm tired. Can't we just go home?"

"If you promise to talk there."

Ennis lowered his hand then just stood there, his back to Jack. He didn't say a word and neither did Jack. He just turned and walked off, leaving Jack standing there. Jack wanted to run after him, but he turned and headed back inside to tell something to Randall and his wife.

Randall was sitting in the living room with a beer. Jack could hear Randall's wife washing dishes in the kitchen. Jack walked over and sat down in the living room, sighing in frustration without really meaning to.

"You just let 'im walk away?" Randall asked, the bottle raised to his mouth. He took a long swig.

"He wants space," Jack shrugged his shoulders. "I'll give him space." He wasn't about to reveal to Ennis just how much Randall knew. Or the reasons why. That would definitely get him to run back to Wyoming.

"Go talk to him," Randall said, gesturing for Jack to go. "I'll tell my wife that Ennis was sick and had to go. Her feelings won't be hurt. She'll understand."

"Sorry 'bout what happened," Jack said, getting to his feet. "I have no idea what the hell is up with him. Couldn't be travelin'. He was fine earlier."

"Then go and find out for fuck's sake!" Randall said. "Ya big idiot. Let me know how it goes." He got to his feet. "And if talkin' don't help." He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and handed it to Jack. "Call that guy and set something up."

Jack looked down at the number written on the paper then back at Randall. "What-"

"When you call, you'll find out."

"Fine," Jack said, stuffing the paper in his pocket. "Sorry again." He turned and left, hurrying his pace to get back home as soon as possible.

When he walked into the apartment, he didn't see Ennis, but the bedroom door was closed. He walked over to it and grabbed the doorknob, cursing under his breath when it was locked.

"Ennis," Jack said, resting his forehead against the door. "Tell me what's wrong." He stepped back and looked down when something slid under the door. He bent down and picked up the paper just as he heard the door unlock.

He didn't open the door yet. He flipped the paper over and understood what had been bothering Ennis. It was a note from Randall. Now he would have to confess and tell Ennis everything. And hope it didn't run him off. "Fuck," he mumbled.

Jack lowered the paper then opened the door and stepped in. Ennis was laying on the bed on his back, staring up at the ceiling. Jack tossed the note in the trash then walked over and climbed onto the bed, straddling Ennis and leaning over him. "Is that what you're thinkin'?" he asked, knowing he didn't need to explain what 'that' was.

At least Ennis didn't look away. He met Jack's gaze straight on. "Am I wrong?"

"No."

Ennis said no more.

"You had no problem with me tellin' you about the woman-"

"At least you told me."

"Do you wanna hear this?"

Ennis finally looked away, saying nothing.

"I was missing you," Jack said. "I'm not you, okay? You probably did just fine without me around. I needed something-"

"So instead of comin' to me sooner, you fucked your friend," Ennis said, looking at Jack with an angry scowl.

"Hey, when I told him about you-"

"What?"

"Yes, Randall knows," Jack said. "Everything."

"Get off me."

"No."

"Jack-"

"I'm not lettin' you run off again," Jack said. "Randall won't say anything to anybody. If he did, I'd ruin him by saying we had sex. But I don't have to worry about any of that because he's a good friend. That's it."

"What about that note?"

"It was written before I told him about you," Jack said. "He stuffed it in the couch like I didn't notice when I mentioned you."

"So it was only once?"

"And that's all I want," Jack said. "Because the one I think about all the time when I'm with anyone is here with me right now. And I would never do anything to hurt you-"

"Does he have to be my friend?"

"If you were nice-"

"I'll try."

"Good," Jack said, planting a kiss on Ennis. "I've got a call to make real quick." He rolled off Ennis then stopped when Ennis grabbed his arm.

"Can that call wait?"

Jack couldn't say no. He rolled back over, covering Ennis' body with his own.


End file.
